FIL toilet iabu

[flamegrilledbytheend]

Sooo first off I'm not the poo troll and I'm aware I'm probably being U but this annoys me more than it should I think! 😂

Just had my downstairs bathroom done, really love it! Means that guests can now have their own bathroom when they stay (Guest bedroom is downstairs). Not sure if this is relevant but may have tipped me over the edge of eye rolling.

ILs visiting today, they live about four hours away and have got the train to see us but are only staying the day (a long story that I won't go into). FIL uses the bathroom 3 or 4 times during the first hour of their visit. Our house is not the largest and at one point things could be heard from the bathroom. I discreetly ask mil if he is okay as I assumed he had caught a bug. Mil informs me that FIL decided to eat cheese on the train journey here and it always gives him 'the shits' in her words. She then laughed and said how he always does this when he visits our house? Then made a comment when he came back about how he had broken in our new toilet 🤢

We usually visit them but now I think about it FIL does always go to the bathroom a lot when he's here.

Anyway in the kitchen I mention this quietly to dh and he says yes cheese has always made his dad have horrendous diarrhoea. We then all go out for lunch. FIL orders a ploughman's sandwich. I shot a look at my dh but said nothing 😂 I haven't counted but I'd say fil has been to the bathroom (in our house and out and about) at least 10 times today.

AIBU to think why would you eat something that you know gives you this shits at someone else's house?! Also they are now on the train home...what kind of gamble is this man taking getting a 2 hour train journey when he is clearly going to need the loo every 5 minutes ?!

I'm aware this is a ridiculous post and I'm not entirely serious in my annoyance but I'm more incredulous at the whole thing!

Some of my IBS triggers are things I really enjoy eating, and occasionally I will have them - but only ever on a weekend evening when I know we don’t have to go anywhere the next day. The idea of having a flare-up on a train is horrible!

My DH eats nuts even though it gives him the shits. He loves them. Maybe it’s the same for your FIL

Why on earth would be do this?
What if the toilet is out of order on the train?
Bloody hell, I hate train toilets at the best of times, Never mind having to use it after someone having a shitfest!

I feel like the people saying I'm BU are thinking I'm bothered about him having a shit in my new toilet 😂 I'm not. I'm just bamboozled at why you'd intentionally give yourself the shits in this social situation! 😂 and then essentially play roulette with your underwear on a train home 🤦🏻‍♀️

flamegrilled I definitely meant him, I think it is quite odd of him to deliberately give himself a stomach upset when going on a journey and visiting someone, truly an example of "nowt as queer as folk."

On the other hand your response sounds very, very reasonable.

Maybe he just doesn't want to spend time with the rest of you and does this so he can hide in a toilet😂 Since he apparently eats cheese every time he goes to yours

Stinking bishop is a cheese OP!

Ah, see you were joking, sorry. As you were!

He's a shit saboteur, a turd terrorist, a poo prankster.

This has really made me laugh. Don't know what to say really. Maybe he is taking the opportunity to have a detox/purge of sorts and thinks a visit to yours every now and then is a good reminder to do it.

Bit odd but maybe to him the taste of cheese is worth the trouble after, his an adult he can make that choice. At least you know it’s not a bug your all going to catch so let him crack on.

I don’t get why you’ve even mentioned in your post about how many times his used the toilet, it’s a toilet that’s what it is for.

This has really cheered me up

You should make him a nice cheese sandwich for the train journey.

I think he's doing some territory marking/status games. People (especially men) sometimes use their faeces as a way of expressing feelings they either don't want to express, or don't even admit to themselves that they have.

My mum has some stomach issues, whenever she’s away from home she eats very cautiously and takes extra medication (as advised by her GP), so as to avoid problems of this nature!

So I do think it’s odd that he would knowingly give himself the shits while away from home, especially travelling on public transport!

It’s weird and not particularly pleasant for you, but a toilet is there for using, as long as he left the bathroom in a fit state for others to use, I’m not sure you can object on that basis.

Did the toilet need cleaning then?

So the shitty git didn't do it himself?

I think he's doing some territory marking/status games. People (especially men) sometimes use their faeces as a way of expressing feelings they either don't want to express, or don't even admit to themselves that they have.

I was going to say the same, actually. It's the deliberate nature of it. Cheese gives him the shits, and he always eats it before coming to your place.

Reminds me of the threads from a couple of years ago where an OP had the father of a client who kept trying to come in and use their private bathroom for some horrendously stinky shits, despite walking past a public toilet at the entrance to the building. There are definitely people (usually men) who use shits as a control/territory thing.

Crapping in a toilet is no big deal.

I think you need to loosen up

@MulticolourMophead

Remember that thread well.

I suffer from IBS and take medication that has the same effect. I actually do not take my medication if I was going to be travelling like this also would refrain from any food which would aggravate my IBS.
Imodium is your friend here. Perhaps he takes it before getting gnon the train

@AllergicToAMop you've got me thinking now...I find him very hard work to talk to (pleasant but you have to really try with him) maybe I should actively encourage the cheese eating 😂

I mentioned the amount because I was slightly concerned about him at first so wanted to explain why I'd asked mil and also because I was in disbelief! 😆

Loving the poo jokes (im a child)

I don't know why he does it at ours...maybe marking his territory who knows! But either way it must be uncomfortable for him, especially on public transport!

@flamegrilledbytheend 😂 You all should really look into a mirror and think about how you behave. Being such a bad company someone willingly gives themselves shits just so they don't have to spend time with you and his wife... tsk tsk...
😂

Mum suffered from IBS and we always worked out where the loos were anytime we took mum out, as she'd have been mortified otherwise.

Personally, I know coffee can trigger needing the loo, so I avoid coffee at certain times, and always before travelling. (Unless I was suffering constipation, in which case I'd be chugging coffee like it was going out of fashion.)

Does he only eat cheese when he knows he's going to your house? If so, I'm wondering is he trying to mark his territory or some other aggressive crap? If he's giving himself the shits, then does the stink not travel around the downstairs then? I presume then you have to give it a really good clean after he has left? If he only eats the cheese when he knows he's going to your house, then I would be assuming it's some issue he has with you/DH. He's happy to stink up your bathroom but not his own - presumably because MIL would go mad?

It's one thing to need to use the toilet for its intended purpose and quite another to deliberately give yourself the shits. How disgusting.

Gross. YANBU

(Though noting your post title begins IABU rather than AIBU)