Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Really nervous about DS' operation

45 replies

Forever48 · 08/01/2020 22:31

My DS is booked in for an operation on Friday, I have anxiety and I'm worrying so much about it.

My DM is coming with us for support but I am the only one allowed in the room whilst he is getting put to sleep, he is 6 and I know that as soon as he falls asleep I'm going to cry buckets through worry.

Is this a normal reaction? I've got really bad social anxiety and I know I'm going to be a wreck so I was wondering whether most parents cry in this scenario.

OP posts:

Shallwedothis · 09/01/2020 11:21

The anaesthetist was amazing with my child. He whipped his phone out as soon as she was wheeled in and said what do you want to watch? She watched shimmer and shine as she was falling asleep! Made the experience much more calm for her. I doubt they do that everywhere but I thought it was a great idea

hazeyjane · 09/01/2020 11:26

My ds has complex needs and has had several general anaesthetics. It is really emotional holding your child as they are being anaesthetised and the staff understand. I hold it together whilst it is happening, and stay calm and strong for ds....then fall apart a bit afterwards!

Original poster

Forever48 · 09/01/2020 20:52

It's been really helpful reading your replies so thank you.

He's very nervous, he's sound asleep now after a big dinner because we are in in the morning. I doubt I'll get much sleep tonight but I will keep my spirits high in front of him, thank you for all the advice.

I'm bringing his Nintendo switch, we've packed an overnight bag just in case and I've got plenty of snacks in there. I've also stocked up with Calpol and Ibuprofen.

OP posts:

midwest · 09/01/2020 20:58

I thought I was doing such a good job of looking calm and together then a nurse patted my arm on the way out of the theatre, told me not to worry. I promptly burst into tears. I was fooling no one but myself!!
I also found it quite emotional seeing dc in recovery room.

Greybeardy · 09/01/2020 21:02

Another anaesthetist here....it would be unusual to specify that you were the only person who could go in with him. If he gets on well with your mum and she’d be less stressed being there than you then I’m sure the team looking after your son would be happy for her to swap in instead of you (I’ve certainly anaesthetised kids with a grandparent present instead. Kids really do pick up on their parents’ fears and honestly having a distressed parent in the room just makes things more stressful for the child.

Bogoffrain · 09/01/2020 21:07

Totally normal, I don’t know if you are aware but sometimes when children wake up they can become delirious. My DS was screaming and trying to rip his cannula out but then he went back to sleep and was completely fine when he properly woke. I wish someone had told me this could happen as I was petrified, it’s quite common though.

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett · 09/01/2020 21:10

If it wasn't normal, they wouldn't have a box of Kleenex in the ansethisa (sp?) room!

Hope it goes well tomorrow. The healing can be quite tough - take a pen and paper with you or make notes on your phone as they'll give you tonnes of good advice which you'll forget, unless that's just me. Letting him pee in the bath is all I can remember!

Mamabear144 · 09/01/2020 21:16

I remember getting my tonsils out when I was 6, I remember a frog teddy and counting down as the anesthetic started to work, I remember my dm with me and she wasn't crying (turns out she broke down as soon as she left the toom) my step dad carried me down to theatre and they were both there when I woke up, half an hour after waking up i was sitting up talking and doing a maths book. At that age all you remember is the fun things throughout the day, you recover quickly and the calpol/ nurofen works a treat, just keep positive, smile when hes looking, cry when hes asleep, try to have things to distract him before and after surgery.

ElsasSalamander · 09/01/2020 21:25

OP it’s a totally normal reaction. My DS was also circumcised at age 5 - we both cried once he went in to theatre, and felt very anxious waiting. Thankfully it was a relatively quick procedure and we were back with him in no time.

He’ll be quite sore for a week or two afterwards, so keep stocked up on the calpol. A tip we were given for after the op was to use one of the standard hospital grey cardboard sick bowls to place upside down over his privates area to prevent anything from touching it e.g. blankets/bedsheets/pyjamas. My DS found this really helpful for a good few days after his surgery. He spent several days with no clothes on his bottom half too - seemed much more comfortable that way & helped the wound heal by letting the air get to it.

HelloAgainYou · 09/01/2020 21:36

Oh lovely. My son had exactly the same operation and I was anxious as fuck. It's so important not to show them you're nervous. Luckily my son really wanted the op so it was a little easier. Spoil him like crazy, look after him and when he's under cry if you need to xx

hanahsaunt · 09/01/2020 21:45

Dh is a doctor and attended many operations. He has taken our children in to the anaesthetic room when they required surgery. Was fab with them until they were taken away and then sobbed. Totally normal even when it's your day job.

AnotherCleftMum · 10/01/2020 22:01

@Forever48 I was thinking of you both today. I hope all went well. Take care.

My little boy had a cleft lip/palate and has had two operations. It was difficult both times, but all the staff were amazing.

aNonnyMouse1511 · 10/01/2020 22:07

You’d be weird if you didn’t feel like this!

haveuheard · 10/01/2020 22:11

It is horrible if they put them under with gas as they can get scared and thrash around for a minute or so. (They were supposed to do an injection but that message didn't get through to the nursing staff so he wasn't prepped for that and they had to use gas.)

Vinosaurus · 10/01/2020 22:58

Just an additional note - your DC will most likely squirm and thrash about a bit on induction (particularly if they're using gas), and it may seem like they're panicking/distressed. This is absolutely normal and expected, won't last long, and they won't remember a thing of it.

Original poster

Forever48 · 11/01/2020 08:42

Operation went very well thank you, I held it together until he fell asleep but the staff were fantastic, we're home now and he's doing well.

Thank you for your replies and concern.

OP posts:

Original poster

Forever48 · 11/01/2020 08:56

They did use gas and he did thrash around and try to get up but they reassured me that it was normal, it has really helped reading your replies.

OP posts:

Onceuponatimethen · 13/01/2020 19:12

That is super news op

Well done you and well done your lovely boy

Geschwister4 · 13/01/2020 19:19

My ds is 13, and has had 14 operations so far. and hugs for you both!

mumontherun14 · 13/01/2020 19:23

Yes I did and my big boy was 14 and it was straightforward day surgery for a broken finger. It is really nerve wracking but the doctors and nurses are so kind you will both be well looked after and it will be such a relief when all done. Hugs xxx

Flip

1 2

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.