Is this absolutely bonkers or feasible?

[Wellweel]

Have NC'd due to fear of outing.

Background:
Live in the middle of nowhere- uni is 2 hours away
When uni begins DC will be in full time nursery/school
DH says he supports it

So I'm starting to take steps to try and get into my dream degree course next year- midwifery. I'm going to do an access course and try my best to get onto a course. The uni is 2 hours away as we live rurally. DH refuses to move. As it's a midwifery course, I'll have long placement shifts and I don't think it'll be safe to do those and drive for four hours, plus do assignments etc. I suggested to DH that I get a basic student accommodation and do half and half- days I will have lectures I'll stay at home, placement shifts I can stay at the accommodation (assuming it'll work out 3:4. He says that's fine and he supports it but will this really work? Could it work? I don't want to become distant for my kids and be selfish but I also don't want to work in a shop forever (absolutely no disrespect to those who do but this is my dream). I thought it'd be best to do it whilst they're young but I don't know anymore. Aibu to think this could work?

It will be really tough. Are you guaranteed a placement in the nearest hospital or might it be anywhere within a certain area? And once you've graduated, how far away is the nearest maternity unit?

I presume midwifery will be like nursing as in similar course set up and when I did my nursing degree it was 12 weeks of lectures and 12 weeks of placement. Also my placement was over an hours drive from the university so you could end up in a placement 3 or more hours away.

You would have to look into how they do the placements.

Get in touch with the head of programme and find out your timetable and as much as possible about your placement. Make sure your DH recognises how much slack he’s going to have to pick up, and that you’re not going to quit because he’s finding it stressful.

Good luck!

It is bonkers, but it’ll be the most rewarding bonkers decision you’ve ever made.

Whilst my actual commute wasn’t 2 hours, we used to have to get the 7 o’clock train to be in for a 9am start, or leave at 0720 if car sharing. It was very hard going, but you just do it because you have to.

Is driving the only options?
Would it be cheaper to get an AirBnB room for the days yours in a late finish/early start at uni, than drive? Or just stay in the accommodation if you do get some.
I never used to see DS for quality time on those days, so if you could avoid the travel, and use this time for study, it may mean when you do go home you have more quality time with the kids?

Placement would be my main concern, where is the closest trust you’d be placed in?

12 weeks that year @Digitalash and every year? I suppose if it's only 12 weeks I could do it from home rather than student accommodation?

I'm trying to think sorry maybe it was 10 weeks but roughly it was started uni in september had lectures till mid November then placement till February lectures till April then placement till July then like a week of lectures to hand in assignments and do exams and stuff repeat for 3 years. It was 10 years ago though so stuff may have changed.

@digitalash

Sounds about right for us also, for me that was 4 years ago.

Speak to your uni about placements as they could be some distance away (or equally could be closer to home) to give you an idea of what to expect. Some unis do offer accommodation p/t for courses like yours especially if their halls aren't full so might be worth a chat with the accommodation office too.

You'll need work experience to get onto the course as well so you'll need to factor that in to your plans (if you're some distance from your local maternity hospital).

@Bipbipbipbip midwifery work experience placements are so hard to get, do you think a care home is relevant enough?

At our uni (I did nursing at a uni an hour away) the placements were quite far apart so there was a lot of travelling for some students, more for the midwifery ones as they only taught that on one campus and placements were scarce so they had to spread them quite far around the whole county while I was lucky that all mine were about 30 mins away. Placements were in blocks of 8-12 weeks, three times a year. Hours ranged massively and you can't always chose the days. Some placements may be 8-5 mon-fri, others will be varied mix of 12 hour days and nights and weekends. Not likely you will always get your shifts in a row, could get lucky with placements but some are more flexible than others. So you can't guarantee that.

I did my degree when all 3 DCs were in primary school and DH was part time self employed so he could do the school runs and anything else when I wasn't there. We had no real family help and there wasn't much in the way of wraparound care here! Financially we were heavily reliant on benefits during that period as DH couldn't work a lot and neither could I!

DH nearly had a mental breakdown though as he's not well suited to the SAHD life. It was a hard three years but well worth it for all that as I am now a qualified professional with a job for life, that I love. DH can now focus on building his business as I have set hours and life is calm now. Three years went by very quickly really!

Only you know whether you and your family can make this work right now, or whether it may be worth waiting a few years or making other changes.

Oh don't expect your university holidays to match up with the school ones, mine didn't. I was on placement for the whole of my last year's summer holidays. So factor in holiday childcare too. You should get help paying for this though.

@orangesa
It really depends on the university and how competitive it is - generally top city universities tend to be the most competitive.

Work experience wise - care homes, nurseries, GP surgeries, children's centres, some hospitals have volunteer schemes - basically anything that can demonstrate your understanding of care and working with people, especially at a vulnerable time. Any personal experience of having a baby or friends/family having a baby can be included in personal statement too- midwifery usually attracts a lot of mums wanting to go back to train.

You do see personal statements where people talk about watching OBEM like that is sufficient training.