Hi, my friend is planning her hen do for when I’m on the unpaid part of mat leave, she wants to go away for it and I felt I could manage to earn/put away enough money to cover the hotel stay, travel and a little spending money so I said I was in. But now she’s asking for payments in advance for other things she wants to do on the night, the night is already adding up to about £140 and that’s before spending money. I was down for a night out in another city, I didn’t think she’d want to do loads of other things that have to be booked and add up. Nothing has been booked yet. I’m a bridesmaid so I really feel I should be there and I was really excited for it until all these other costs started getting mentioned, AIBU to just say I’m not going at all? There’d be no point in paying for the hotel and meeting them later because the extra things mean I wouldn’t be able to join them unless I pay, it’s either all or nothing. She thought it would be fine because because I’m still getting paid mat leave right now but it’s a bit expensive even now never mind when I’m not getting paid and I need the money now to put away for my unpaid. I feel like I’ve forked out so much already for this wedding I really can’t justify anymore, I’m not the one getting married. I just feel really shitty about the whole situation 😞 any advice?