Kind of ex/fb

[SaltwaterCrocodile]

I already know I’m being unreasonable carrying on with this but I really love him. I’ve tried to stop myself feeling the way i do but I can’t and this way I feel less bad about everything.

We were in a relationship for a while last year. Kept in touch when we split up, he’ll meet up with me occasionally, we still sleep together.

I’m not really sure what the relationship we have is at the moment, he still tells me i mean a lot to him, supports me with stuff but makes excuses about why we can’t properly be together. He’s going through some things and as some family problems going on and said he doesn’t want to start anything while that’s happening.

AIBU to ask him outright if he ever sees us being together again properly after he’s said that already? Or should I just leave things as they are? I don’t want to stop seeing him, I tried that and I miss him too much, I don’t want to be with anyone else either.

He's leaving you dangling until someone better comes along OP.

I know you don't want to stop seeing him but all you're doing is prolonging the hurt.
Ask him again if you want complete clarity, but be prepared to not like the answer.

Right now he's having his cake and eating it too, when someone else does come along you'll be dropped and will have no recourse because 'I told you I didn't want to be with you.'

Cut him loose, start living your life, raise your bar and build your confidence.
Don't allow him to drag you along anymore.
It'll end in you hurting, not him.

I’m in agreement with above. Unfortunately, I don’t believe he sees in you what you think you may see in him. It may be better to take control now and end things with him instead of prolonging pain and uncertainty.

You sound like me in my late 20s, I was infatuated with a man who was referred to by one and all as The Gobshite. I felt I could put up with his moody behaviour because I meant a lot to him, just to be around him would be enough. Truly, it’s not enough.

I do understand it will be painful, but please know that you are worth so much more than the crumbs of attention that this man gives you. It was plain to everyone else that the relationship was never going anywhere, but as long as I believed it might I trapped myself.

Please, don’t keep going back, I wasted so much time, emotion and energy on the Gobshite. He wasn’t worth it and we broke up finally after a pregnancy scare, he categorically didn’t want kids.

You deserve someone who will love and value you in return. You need to do this for yourself. Don’t hang on only for him to meet someone and say yes, you meant a lot to me, but it wasn’t love.

Believe in yourself, you’ll get through the pain. Open yourself up to new opportunities and people.

"Going though some things" = busy seeing other people and keeping you on the back burner for fallow periods. And you know that, deep down. If he wanted a relationship with you, he'd be in one.

Don't embarrass yourself further. If he wanted to be with you, he'd be with you.

Find some self respect and move on.

You'll never be able to move on if you don't drop his ass. He sleeps with you when is convenient for him, he doesn't want a relationship.

Have some respect for yourself

Grow a back bone. Your only ever going to be a puppet on a string. In a relationship when s**t gets tough you lean on your partner. You don't tell them we need to be seperate until after say my parents divorce. His playing you and is probably seeing other people too. Your just a last resort when he wants some but isn't getting any. Have some self respect. Delete his number and block it. The only way your moving forward is no contact and believe me if you had some self respect you would know you can do better.

Sorry to be blunt but you're a FWB which is ok if it's what you both want....but you dont

He's using you. Stop letting him.

He's just keeping you there for an easy shag when he needs one.

Walk away. If it really is meant to be then he will run after you and make the commitment you want. If he doesn't, keep walking.

Have you ever seen that episode of ‘How I Met your Mother’ in which they all have someone on their ‘hook’
That’s what you are I’m afraid, on his hook