smokers around my newborn baby

[Damthatonestaken]

Hi everyone,
I know people shouldn't smoke around my baby, so obviously that's banned, but should smoking friends be asked to change their clothes before approaching the baby? Im so worried the baby's lungs might be damaged by tobacco products on their clothes (and breath!). My Health Visitor didn't really spell it out for me.
Advice please from all the old hands at this game and especially any Health Visitors out there! Thanks very much

I would ask that they waited after finishing their cigarette for a good 20 minutes at least and wash their hands. Thankfully I didn’t have many smokers around me then.

It is perfectly reasonable to not allow people to smoke in your house, or even theirs when the baby is there. Not to ask them to change their clothes. This is mainly an issue for smoking parents who are handling the baby all the time. A two minute cuddle is not a big deal

I haven’t any helpful advice but will be following with interest as I would like to know this too, the idea freaks me out a bit of chain smoking relatives and what impact it can have on the baby! Especially when myself and dh don’t smoke so it seems even worse then to expose the baby!

Asking them to change clothes isn't reasonable, but asking them to smoke outside, wait 20/30 minutes, take off coat if they were wearing one and wash hands is fine. I don't allow anyone who smells of smoke to touch my kids while they smell of it.

If you are really worried you can stop smokers holding the baby- it's extreme but your choice.

I'm also of the opinion you can't police other peoples houses. So if you plan to visit a smoker who smokes in their house I don't think you can demand they don't whole you're there (and it's a moot point anyway because the house will be full of it anyway), I would personally just not visit and meet them elsewhere.

I did the wait 30 minutes and wash hands. I asked my dad to change his top once because I could smell the smoke across the room.
I wouldn't normally ask people to change clothes though.

I also did the wait 30 mins and wash hands, DF and FIL both smoke but only in the garden - and my dad always puts his dressing gown/jacket on to smoke.

As PP have said and as I was advised by the NICU staff when bringing my premature twins home as PIL smoke, the advice is:

Wear a coat/jacket and remove before approaching baby.
Wait at least 30 minutes and wash hands thoroughly before handling baby.

My DD was on oxygen for the better part of the first year of her life so I went so far as to say that if they couldn't go without a fag whilst visiting us (they rarely stay longer than 2 hours) that they would have to wait until they could go that long without one. Mainly because even with the above measures I could still smell it on them, whether others consider this to be extreme or not I don't care, I wasn't taking any risks with my DS or DD when they were that tiny and fragile.

Many of us lived through the 70s,80’s early 90’s and before! Obviously smoking is bad, smells gross and we’re a better society now than we were then but seriously people have become wayyy to OTT about this. Obviously you don’t want a stinky smoker all over you baby but someone who’s had a fag and a hand wash isn’t going to do it any harm. I mean this nicely, save yourself the worry 😊

My mil smokes heavily and when she came to see newborn we asked her to bring a coat to wear and wait until she holds the baby. She was so offended and said that it wasn't dirty 🙄 and that she wasn't happy. I told her she wasn't holding my baby. She stinks of smoke, it's everywhere. In her hair, on her skin. Ergh. If she wants that fair enough but I don't want my house or kids to be smelling of smoke

I wouldn’t let any smokers near my baby. If their cancer sticks are more important to them than the health of my baby then that is up to them; but while they’re damaging their own and others health they are not going near my baby.

Thankfully, though, I don’t have any family members or friends that smoke.

I do think its all a bit much. Fair enough smoking outside and washing hands but waiting 30 mins to go neae the baby? What about parents that smoke? Unless your baby has or has had breathing problems i think washing hands and smoking outside is enough

It is not clear the harm of 3rd hand smoke on newborns and babies, some 'experts' (who frankly know a hell of a lot more than I do) say the toxins in 3rd hand smoke can lead to respiratory illnesses or affect lung development, so while it is a possibility why take it?

It is easy enough to keep smoking entirely away from a baby so why take the risk? When ds was a baby smokers were kept away, I'd rather ruffle a few smokers feathers than take that risk. Any smokers I met were understanding, obscurely, they hate smoking and its risks too.

What about parents that smoke?

Don't understand the question. They obviously need to make the decision to stop smoking, reduce the risk by taking some precautions like hand washing and/or just take the risk? Doesn't mean non-smoking parents should take the same risks because smoking ones 'have' to.

When ds was born the community midwife happened to be a bloke. He read the riot act to all the builders we had in at the time (who often smoked in the garden), telling them not to come in the same room as the baby if they'd had a fag in the last 20 min, and to change their top after a fag before coming inside. And definitely both if they wanted to ever cuddle the baby.

They all took it very well.

30 minutes is for if they’re holding the baby @mrsed1987 as advised by the hospital continual care nurses when my twins were discharged from NICU after a 4 month stay and DD had a collapsed lung and bronchiolitis just before her release, it’s to reduce the amount of exhaled carbon monoxide being passively inhaled by the baby if the holder/smoker is cuddling close and talking to them. I was a smoker before I had DD and DS, quit the day I found out I was pregnant with them. Fell off the wagon after a bereavement last year for a few months now back to not smoking, I still followed these rules even though DD and DS are now 2yo and DD has thankfully been off oxygen for a year now. I’d rather be seen as OTT than chance a preventable risk.

Well I grew up around smoking parents and me and my brother both have asthma. To this day smoke sets off my asthma. I don't think asking people to wait 30 minutes is excessive and would ask them to wear a coat, which could be removed before they touch the baby.

Smokers don't realise how much their hair and clothes smell of smoke, even a while later. I had someone round who had smoked before coming to the house and I had to open all the windows after they left and use my inhaler twice.

Many of us lived through the 70s,80’s early 90’s and before! Obviously smoking is bad, smells gross and we’re a better society now than we were then but seriously people have become wayyy to OTT about this. Obviously you don’t want a stinky smoker all over you baby but someone who’s had a fag and a hand wash isn’t going to do it any harm. I mean this nicely, save yourself the worry 😊

I hate this attitude my dad said "I used to smoke around you and your brother, it didn't do you any harm"
There is a lot more research into the damage smoking does compared to the 70s, 80s and 90s. Also the 30 minute rule and wearing a coverup/changing tops is the advice of the NHS, not parents being ott.
Plus, my baby, my rules, I wouldn't call that precious.

70s child here. Smokey houses, smokey pubs and snooker clubs smokey grandparents houses.

I hope none of you above ever keep the kids in a room while you spread anti perspiant, or Mr sheen, or light an open fire.

I hope they never go outside near cars etc etc.

Barring kids with serious chest or breathing g issues, worrying about if someone near them has had a cigarette is bonkers in my opinion.

With both my babies I've asked people to smoke outside in a coat they could take off and wash hands. When they came in I then usually fed and changed my babies before handing them over to allow a bit of time to pass. I was told with my first that you are still exhaling fumes from a cigarette up to 20 minutes later.

Small lives are so precious, and babies' lungs are so tiny. They've got the rest of their lives being filled up with toxins and pollution and I don't really think it's worth giving them a head start on that!

DS had brionchiolitis at a few months old and cradling him on my lap as we were blue lit to hospital with those horrible little sucky pads stuck all over his tiny body as he gasped for air was one of the single most terrifying experiences of my life.

Whatever rules you decide to impose or not, the thing to remember is this is your baby, and you are his/her proxy. Your baby can't speak for itself, so make sure you do.

I would suggest a 15 minute wait after cigarette before holding the baby.
They should also wash their hands.
Wearing a closed coat over their clothing and taking that off will also help.
I wouldn't be offended by any of this.
And I'm a smoker!