AIBU being a different person at work to home?

[Flowerballs]

Anybody adopt a completely different persona for work? Not like a professional version of yourself, that's a given, but a fundamentally different person. A new company has taken us over and they are horrendously cheesy. I'm thinking of doing this as a coping mechanism and a way to disconnect from work when I'm at home. I'm hoping it would be like playing a part and creating a detachment from getting wound up by work...Does anybody do this? Does it work?

No...I couldn't. I work for myself and I'm very introverted.

You're more likely to give yourself a nervous breakdown by doing that tbh. I did it for several years before I just couldn't anymore and found a different job. Being two people is hard work, especially if you have to be 4 really, as You, Mum, Partner, Employee all have to fit in there somewhere.

Cryingoverspilttea - thank you for sharing that. It's a really good point. I think I'm trying to avoid the truth that I need to look for a new job.

Of course you can, a lot of people do to a certain extent.

At work I’m incredibly confident, articulate, driven and sure of everything I say. At home I can barely string a sentence together and have no idea how I even make it in to work I’m that lazy and lacking in self belief.

I wouldn't say I act like a completely different person, but I definitely try to exude a more confident version of my personality, and I'm for sure more of a pushover in my personal life than I am at work. Surely, you'll find it difficult to keep up this persona and it'll cause you more harm than good?

I have to do it

But I keep my head down as much as I can if that makes sense

I recently went to another of our offices and they were, as you say, horrendously cheesy. Everybody smiles, nods and agrees and claps (as in congratulations!!!!) all the fucking time. They ALL do it! Me and my colleague were but I think if you were in that environment you'd have to join in.

It's extreme fakery obviously, but needs must

At work I’m incredibly confident, articulate, driven and sure of everything I say. At home I can barely string a sentence together and have no idea how I even make it in to work I’m that lazy and lacking in self belief.

^

You need to be true to yourself OP. I couldn't take on a false persona at work.
I can't say it did my career any favours.
My priority was my family and my true self. Not payslip success. It wasn't easy financially but I wouldn't change it.
They're in their 20s now and very happy living at home still. i hope they move soon
They're good fun. saving grace and I'm proud of them. It's doable.

A young friend tells me he has to do all sorts of bizarre high fiving, huddling, having to provide an inspirational quote and speech once a week, other activities which seem to be the equivalent of show and tell.It's all bizarre but there are worse things.If you have to adopt a different persona to get through the day that's fine.
I recall working with a very formal gentleman who was soon to retire.The dress down Fridays almost finished him but he arrived at work in a pair of beautifully ironed chinos and the shiniest deck shoes ever.

Yes I do. I don't really mind the positive thinking high fiving thing at work. It gets things done in that environment and really nobody's actually like that, are they? I view it as similar to going on a night out and being really upbeat etc. It's just what you do. Doesn't mean it's you.

I do share cynical exasperated emails with a sympathetic colleague/friend when it gets on my tits too much though.

Yes I run a team of 15 at work with a budget of over £40mil per year, I'm motivated organised and knowledgeable. At home I just slink around in my dressing gown being lazy and doing the bare minimum

You need to be true to yourself OP. I couldn't take on a false persona at work

Bloody hell - if I followed that advice, I’d be unemployable

I think this is an important skill actually, in terms of compartmentalizing your life. I've read the advice "be at work when you're at work, be at home when you're at home" in a book about mindfulness and I think that is just another way is saying that your focus and your mindset is different when your at home and when you're at work. We all do this anyway. When you're talking to your GP you have a different mindset from when you're talking to your children. It's not a fake persona by any means, you're just expressing a different part of yourself. (I would argue that the concept of a "true self" is a bit hokey anyway, bit that's a different thread). This could also mean going along with a certain working culture is that helps your relationships and achievement at work.