to think I should be able to be upstairs for 10 minutes!

[wheniwonder]

Is it honestly asking to much to be able to nip upstairs long enough for a wee and to get some washing without DH and DD (his DSD) having a full blown nasty row ending in her in tears and him having a tantrum?????? FFS!

Tell him to get a grip, he's the adult.

Wow um a regular occurrence then? YANBU to expect him to act like an adult. How old is your DD?

Sometimes I get this with DCs (teens) and often get it with DH and DCs if I dare pop to my mums for a cuppa (2 min walk away). I either get called back by DCs crying or get back and DCs confined to their rooms coz DH couldn’t cope with them x

How old is your dd?

Ah is this one of these “why are men so useless” threads? *muting

DD is 11 going on 25. DH is not useless by any means but he is infuriating

Does he pick on her as soon as you are out of the way?

Its not a toxic environment and he doesnt pick on her - they argued about the cat, his disapproval of her friend (for what I think are irrational reasons ) and where she wanted to sit on the sofa!

He needs to grow the fuck up. Children are self centered, entitled shits, that’s their job. He is the adult and needs to act like it.

Sounds just like my DD and DH (her Dad). If it's not one thing then it's another and I'm always caught in the middle.

Funnily enough, if I go away they get along just fine.

Ah is this one of these “why are men so useless” threads? muting*

Oh no!! We’ve upset a man!! Bad bad women. How could you!

He argued with her about where she wanted to sit on the sofa? Rather immature IMO. As for her friend, it’s usually wiser to not push on a child who they should or should not be friends with... no idea about the Cat as context would be needed.

Is it a 6 of one, half a dozen of the other situation? Meaning do they push each other’s buttons a lot? At 11 I know I could be quite vocal against authority figures. If he’s been her SD for a good portion of her life maybe you need to remind him to pick his battles and not react in kind to a child. Even if she’s pushing boundaries she really is just a child at 11yo.

they adore each other much of the time. It is definitely 6 of 1 and half a dozen of the other. Not regular by any means but just frustrating today.
lived many years in a toxic relationship - this is absolutely NOT one

He sounds immature, he is supposed to be the grown up.