To ask for your daftest advice

[justcly]

So, I have the flu. It is the actual flu, not a cold with added drama. Apparently, I'm "in a cluster" (no, me neither). Anyway, it started on 27th December, so I am gradually approaching the other side of it, apart from bad catarrh and a still-ropey chest. So earlier in the evening, I had a mad coughing fit and accidentally swallowed my last Hall's Mentholyptus whole. Which was distressing, because they have been the only things keeping me from drowning in my own snot (stick with me, the whole post isn't this disgusting). I rang my mum for a little whinge and she told me to peel an onion and put it under my bed.

I mean, is this a thing, or is my mother nuts? And just to amuse me, what is the daftest advice you have ever received?

I was in Mothercare and peered over the head of the pram to check on 2 week old DD (so I was looking at her upside down). A member of staff told me not to do that as her eyes would roll back in her head looking at me and get stuck. She also told me not to buy soothers as they were 'horrible things'. Sadly, no-one had explained that to DD, because she loved them.

It's dangerous to pick up your DD now your pregnant, she should walk around the house, climb the stairs etc.

DD at the time was just over a year old... And couldn't walk yet. Yes I picked her up quite a lot... And continued to do so throughout the pregnancy.
That was a neighbour who I bumped into at the midwife clinic.

From a HV... 'You are an Officers wife, you can't send your DD to the local school with the soldiers children. You should send her to the village school several miles away.' We wouldn't have got a place anyway as we lived to far away, and said village school was near another army camp and the soldiers children from there attended if we were bothered about such things

"DD won't bond with DH if you breastfeed...."

Ok, MIL

My mum, looking at my ankle and foot facing the wrong way after a fall down 40 stairs "I'm not sure it really needs a&e"
Even my dad was at her

Pharmacist when I had severe bacterial tonsillitis "stop the antibiotics and just gargle with salt water"