Have holidayed before with boyfriend's friends .. I don't want to do it again.

[Petals23]

My boyfriend has a group of about 15 friends that he knows through an activity. They usually go on one trip abroad a year and I've gone the last 2 years even though they were to destinations I'd been to before but my boyfriend was keen to go so I went. These people are really not my cup of tea... are quite cliquey, drink a lot, and I just don't want to go away with them this year but I have told my boyfriend he should still go. Also, it's not somewhere again I would choose to go. I don't think I'm being unreasonable as I've made an effort the last two years... am I?

Holiday allowance is precious. Don’t waste it on something you don’t want to do.

It’s entirely your decision. However what does this mean for your boyfriend and future holiday plans. Do you expect him not to go as well?

Would this be your only holiday together and if so maybe you need to have a discussion about holiday plans in the future. Whether you go on your own trips but combine them with a couple holiday or just do your own things.

It would be unreasonable to have expectations and to harbour resentment if you don’t have this conversation and agreement in place.

YANBU, I Can't think of anything worse than being on holiday with people you do not get on with. You have done your penance for the last two years.

Nope not unreasonable
Does your bf mind you're not going? Can you still do something else just the two of you?

How could you BU not to go?

Where it gets interesting is the implications this holiday has for the time and money you both have available for other holidays.

Of course not. Explain to him that you don't fancy it and you'll stay home this year. It's a lot of money and using annual leave from work for something you don't want to do.

LemonTT, I've told him he should still go. It wouldn't be our main holiday - this trip is 5 nights, so even if I did go we'd still go somewhere else ourselves. I've absolutely no problem him going... he's thinking about it.

So he's booked the trip for just himself, which I didn't mind. However he told me he's also going to do another trip with a different group now also - no partners, which is fine. He said he'd still like to go somewhere with me. I am a bit surprised he's doing a second trip. However, we are both very independent and don't live together.