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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be pissed at MIL?

7 replies

An0nym0us2011 · 02/01/2020 19:19

Iv posted before about how horrible my MIL is, smokes weed around kids, leaves it laying about, gives babies fizzy drinks, teaches them to swear etc..(obviously my kids she's not allowed to smoke around them or give them stuff, she's never had unsupervised visits)

She's one of those that constantly post on facebook about her grandkids and pretends to be a trophy nana..when in reality her eldest son has stopped going around and we've distanced ourselves. She has another son and he takes his kids all the time becajse he doesn't care for his kids wellbeing.

A week or so before Christmas DP was at his mum's and she was having ago because we haven't taken the kids (she never ever makes the effort to come to our house, she's only 54 & works 2 hours in the morning).
DP keeps telling her she needs to make the effort because it's not fair that we trapes our 2 under 2 kids on trains to see her. But we used to go every week/fortnight but we're both fed up with her behaviour.
Her other sons offer to drive her here but she refuses.
However she came once Monday before Xmas and was itching to go after 15minutes.
She never called Christmas to speak to DC infact still hasn't called.

Today our 10mo had an quite a bad accident in which we had to get an ambulance, DP called her to tell her what happened, she wasn't that bothered and shes not once asked if she's ok..the accident happened at about 12.

Aibu to think she should be making checking in as the "trophy nana" she is? Or do I we just stop bothering? This was more of a rant then anything

OP posts:
ssd · 02/01/2020 19:21

I think you should keep your distance from her, she sounds nothing but trouble.

slipperywhensparticus · 02/01/2020 19:23

Give her no more headspace ffs I messenger my NEIGHBOUR when her kids in hospital not to pester her just let her know I'm there for her and on standby to feed the cat etc it's just being nice

AppleKatie · 02/01/2020 19:23

I understand why but this is a displacement worry and she’s really not worth your time or energy. Distance yourself emotionally.

80skid · 02/01/2020 19:26

She's a social media nanna. For your own sanity, block her or unfollow her. Let her come to you and make the effort. And mourn the grandmother that your kids deserve, because they don't have one, then carry on your life with the positive people who actually care and show it day in, day out, without needing "likes" in return.

An0nym0us2011 · 02/01/2020 19:28

I just don't understand how she can not ask about her grandchild, it's not difficult to just send a text. It's like because DP told her we can't always make the effort she's seen her arse and not wanting to bother with us. Which is fine for me I can't really stand the women but don't make out your the world's greatest grandparent when you can't ask about one of them after been rushed to hospital

OP posts:
Rollonspringtime2020 · 02/01/2020 19:29

We went nc with a couldn't give a fuck dgm.
She told anyone who would listen we had cut her off!!. Been 5 glorious years op.. Def recommend it!!

slipperywhensparticus · 02/01/2020 20:02

According to my moms social media my mom has one grandchild my daughter she actually has two grandsons as well...also my children

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