Job with 50k salary... Feeling weird...

[Frostysunshine]

Okay so this is a strange one, I've nobody in RL to ask for advice, so I'll give you a brief back story... I'm having a bit of, what can only be described as, a quarter-life-crisis at the moment. I'm 25, I graduated from uni two years ago and have been working as a teacher since then. I enjoy my job, but I always have this niggling feeling that I will get bored of it eventually, and bored of the poor pay if I don't want to become a head teacher. But at the same time, I battle with the fact that relative to my parent and partner, it's decent and stable money (28k) and that I wouldn't be guaranteed this money if I left and did a non-teacher job. So basically I worry that if I leave i wouldn't know what to do or what I'd enjoy doing, and I would definitely have to take a pay-cut and may never out-earn what I do teaching anyway.

So to my feeling weird part... I was staying with a friend on the run-up to Christmas, who was telling us about someone who we went to uni with. We all went to a pretty low-rate uni, this person studied business there. After graduation, they were working in restaurants and bars, alongside a part time office job and applied for a job on a whim. They got the job and have ended up on 50k within a matter of months.
I can't put my finger on why it's impacted me so much, but I can't let it go. Not so much about them, but more-so about what the hell I'm doing with my life. My partner earns less than me, he's trying his best to persue promotion and we are scraping to buy a house together. I feel like I'm failing him and myself because I can't gun for a payrise/promotion in my job. I just can't let go of the fact that I could be earning 50k VS the reality check that I keep trying to give myself that it probably doesn't work that way for most people. I'm feeling like I'm failing to provide at the moment, and I'm worried that if I stick at this job I'm going to reach 30/40 and wonder what I could have done/been earning at this point. My degree is in education and psychology (regret), and so I feel like I'm pretty pigeon-holed.

I need some realistic advice because I can't let this go and I have nobody to ask who might offer helpful suggestions.

I would apply for some graduate entry schemes with the big companies if I see you and give it a go. You could always go back to teaching.

I wouldn't know what graduate schemes to even apply for, I have no experience outside of schools and my degree is pretty awful when it comes to being eligible for schemes.

You can probably still access career guidance from your university. I would arrange to see them as they will be able help.

It’s all relative to industry and skill set. My DH was on a six figure salary by 25, I wasn’t. He worked 14 hour days, went abroad with work and sacrificed a lot, I never wanted to.

My salary has improved with experience. I am in an industry where I could easily earn £80+ but I like a work/life balance and don’t want to live in London.

Comparison is the death of happiness. Just because your peer is earning 50k does not mean that you could/should. By all means cast your net around and if you're not happy then look around, but do so without comparing yourself to others and do not forget that job satisfaction is far more important than income. I say this as someone who, at 40, esrns less than half what I did in my mid-20s, but is a damn sight happier. I don't have a much lower quality of life either as I always seemed to spend what I earned without noticeable effect on quality of life (as long as I earned enough to cover the basics, of course)

My first thought was that this person is one of those lucky types who comes across really, really well in interview. I used to know someone exactly like this. Jobs were literally his for the choosing, regardless of his qualifications/experience. He changed jobs a lot trying to find something that really interested him, yet the number of jobs in his CD doesn't seem to affect his chances either. He's a lovely guy btw.

There's a grad scheme called Ambitious Futures for university management, which could be relevant or the civil service or local government grad schemes? And i think a lot of the accountancy/finance ones are open to people of all backgrounds

What’s the job?

It’s not an unreachable salary but IME unless you have specific qualifications you have to be a Type A with charisma.

My sister left school with one gcse and got an office ‘girl Friday’ job. She is now late thirties and earns around £70k as an HR head. But she is a people person, quite pushy and is constantly striving for bigger better roles and pay rises. She works very hard but there is a certain amount of having your face fit that she freely admits to.

Dh earns slightly less in a professional software job but he is the opposite character and tbh could earn more if he was inclined to but it would mean being a team leader/manager which he would hate.

Meanwhile I earn just over min wage in a shop and I LOVE it. I used to earn 25k+ in a sales job and it nearly killed me.

So there’s lots to think about. Teaching is a solid career and the grass isn’t always greener.

You can of course move jobs. If you have no idea what kind of graduate stuff to apply for then you need to think about it. What do you actually want to do? Have an interest in? Obviously no one goes into teaching for the money, it's crap compared to other jobs.

Your actual degree doesn’t make much difference to a lot of grad schemes unless you decide to be a lawyer where you’ll have to do a conversion course.

What do you actually like doing - a high salary doesn’t make up for a job you don’t enjoy —believe me—

I know what you mean, I teacher too (I'm 22) and know I'll get bored of it. But DP went to a crap uni and got a 3rd ans is on more than double my pay from my good uni with a 1st. I am jealous but also there is nothing stopping me from moving on from teaching. I try not to compare too much

Comparison is the thief of joy. You will never be happy if you continue to compare yourself like this. You're allowing someone elses salary (and good fortune) to negatively impact your own life.
I relate to this as I've battled the same issues. I did very well in the first 5 years leaving uni and have now stagnated and watched my friends far surpass me in income and lifestyle. The first time my best friend got promoted ahead of me really affected me but I've long since come to accept it and she now earns double my salary.
Life is a journey with so many ups and downs. People will earn well and then quit their jobs and retrain, some will have children and career will lose it's importance, some will progress fast and then plateau and others find their way later in life. There really is no 'perfect' path and it isn't a race to the top it really isn't. Focus on you and what makes you happy.

If you want to be earning more, or to be in a different industry then look around and see what might be available. Even if it not your exact field, or you are slightly short on experience for the role. Are there industries in your area you are interested in working in? If not, consider applying for jobs elsewhere and moving.

Among my friends one of the biggest barriers to career development has been a reluctance to move away from 'home' early in their working life.

Can you look as it that you have nothing to lose?

If you apply for other better paying careers and don't get a role - then you have your 'decent and well paying' job. If you do - then great. You can't lose.

If I were you I would search for jobs on job websites that are in your preferred location that pay £50,000 and then see if any of them take your fancy. You may need to apply for a 'lower down' job in that industry, but you may not.

Teaching has many many transferable skills and literally no-one will be surprised to see a teacher looking to move to another career. And you are so young, don't pigeon hole yourself.

Train as an Ed Psych?

Have a look at some of the threads on here about the dpouses of high earning people never seeing them or getting any support, but feeling 'trapped' by mortgages expectations etc in a high income life.

Im notvsaying teaching isn't hard work, it certainly is. But it also is unquestionably worthwhile.

You are young but also now have good work experience most of which would also be useful in a huge number of other jobs (planning, organisation, working solo, being diplomatic etc etc etc) You are at an ideal stage to move into another industry but for goodness sake make it something you believe in and fits with your wider aims for family and home life, recreation, and doing something (reasonably) worthwhile, interesting and satisfying. Enough money is of course very desirable as is security, but sacrificing your home life and personal satisfaction for a number on a payslip seems like a recipe for stress at home and at work

In 9 years you will be on at least 40k in teaching. Maybe more with possible pay rises coming in.

The holidays are good too and we are putting something back into the community.

You could tutor also for £25 p/h if you needed more money.

I think there is every chance of moving. Take done careers advice, look into it, ask around, google a lot.

Agree that 'comparison is the thief of all joy'. I struggle with this a lot and am very miserable. Don't let that happen to you!

I feel like a huge barrier for me is because I've only every worked in schools (I was a teaching asst before being a teacher) I have no idea what life outside of school is like.
People are so right when they say about trying to to compare, but I feel like this is bigger than just comparison. I'm not even thinking about that individual on that salary, it's more that I'm panicking that I'm going to be unfulfilled if I stay on a bad wage, and not for a great work-life balance either (teacher!). Plus, I don't know how I'll cope when my career inevitably stagnates, I don't want to end up feeling depressed.
I just feel trapped with my degree and in a way current salary, too. I know I'll have to take a pay-cut and take a risk if I want to leave teaching. Being a teacher is a huge part of my identity, but this feeling of not knowing anything other than the classroom is horrible too.

OP
Why did you go into teaching?

I think sometimes people teach because it is familiar, and they don't know what else to do.

Have a look at the BPS website- they have a small section on what you can do with a psychology degree apart from becoming a psychologist.

You could do a masters in a range of subjects- including business.

Have you thought of a masters in educational psychology? There were bursaries for this.

You could do postgraduate degrees in subjects like law

You could retrain and get a healthcare based degree ( ie nursing etc)

Accountants need industry based qualifications, which you could gain without an obviously related degree.

Becoming a detective requires a degree

Some industries like cybersecurity look for people with analytical skills, and will train the right person.

People who go into marketing often have varied degrees- it is possible to earn well.

In my opinion, once you start feeling trapped in an occupation, it's time to start planning your escape.
It sounds like you're starting to figure out what is important to you in a career, and perhaps money is? No shame in that 😊

It’s not quite true to say you “could” be earning £50K, because you are not him. Why are you not comparing yourself to someone earning £100K in their 20s in the city in the finance? Because you don’t feel connected enough to that. There is a reason this man is earning £50K and it’s not just luck. The two of you are not interchangeable. You are in a job where the career prospects can be excellent - yet you’re stalling at the prospect of progressing.

If teaching was the wrong decision for you - fine, get out.

But if it’s just a niggling doubt that you might get bored - why not gun for promotion anyway? You might as well quit teaching bored with it in 5 years time as a head of department, than in 5 years time still on the lowest rung. And in progressing you might find that you want to stay in teaching. And if you don’t, by professing in teaching you’ll have more to offer externally AND understand what kind of role you’re looking for.

It sounds like a touch of jealousy alongside a perfectly normal feeling of not being sure of your current choice. Either move on - or put your all into your current career.

You’re being very passive about your options - putting down your uni and degree. You also sound perhaps a bit passive about the way you describe this guy’s profession. He applied “on a whim”? That makes it sound like he was just lucky. Just phrase that as “he saw something that interested him, and went for it!”. Very different! He sounds proactive, and you could try that too.

Cross post...

OP
Start by making a big list of your skills- those you have gained on your degree and in your job.

Make another list of what you have enjoyed learning about.

If you can, make another of your strengths ( or if you don't like using the word " strengths" , tasks you feel comfortable doing)

One thing stood out about your update- you said you know you will take a pay cut if you leave teaching.
Are you sure? It sounds like the 50 grand scenario is challenging some of your beliefs.

“When my career inevitably stagnates”?

Why inevitably?

OP you are 25! So young really. Leave and do something else if you want to!

What kind of things do you think you'd enjoy? Seen as though teaching can be very intense and demanding in regards to a healthy work/life balance, do you want a job you can switch off from when home? Or is money the primary indicator of fulfillment? You will have transferable skills from your degree and time in schools, but it really depends; there are some fairly 'random' jobs which you can progress in quickly and with any training done on the job, because of supply and demand.