Annoyed with people assuming 3rd pregnancy people was unplanned?

[Worriedmum97]

Im 33yo and pregnant with 3rd, took us 2+ years to get pregnant this time with lots of drugs, medical interventions, laparoscopy, etc. We are a dual career family (both work full time), our 2 DCs go to private schools, we can get them on holidays few times a year. Why would our relatives and close friends when we tell them about a new baby arriving soon the first question we get is whether it was an accident. Did you have the same with baby 3+? Or is it just us? We are from an Eastern European-ish country and all our relatives still live there and our closest friends are from there, so maybe that is just the cultural thing?

@WorraLiberty

Huh? What's that got to do with the price of fish? confused

By my statement I was just trying to say that we are in a position where we can afford one more child without sacrificing on opportunities for our children. And we rely only on ourselves (no government or relatives support), we have never used any public funds (never been eligible to even child benefits), so we are not getting someone else’s money by having more children (appreciate we’ve probably been lucky to some extent and if something happens we may need help).

Pregnancy is one of those weird times in your life when the most intrusive and offensive questions seem to get asked all the time. Questions about your body and your sex life are nobody else's business! As PP have suggested, just smile and nod and try to ignore how bloody nosey people can be!

But what does that have to do with a possible unplanned pregnancy?

They happen to people from all walks of life, not just those on low incomes.

It's rude. Definitely rude. I hated being pregnant because of all this crap.

I have no fucks to give that we as a family are contributing to over population.

Yeah, people don't generally. And we wonder why the planet's screwed.

3 seems to be the new 2 where I live...very few comments made... Although my Polish friend tells me she see 3 children as a lot and my friends in India seem to be sticking at 1. Suppose its just different cultures/expectations.

Personally I would pressume a 18 month to 4 or 5 year gap was a planned pregnancy.. Perhaps pressume unplanned if less than a year apart (mainly because I just couldn't cope with it) or 10 years + apart but I'd never be rude enough to comment... People just seem to see pregnant women as a talking point... Why they can't just be kind I don't know!

I was asked this with my first and second pregnancy. I think it's rude when people ask but people seem to think its fine .. Not sure why they need to know if we were actively screwing for a baby or if something went wrong for us to get pregnant without wanting to. None of their damn business!

Just ignore them OP. Your choices are no one else's business. People assume mine have different dads due to the 6 year age gap and me being a single parent. It's actually because my second baby was stillborn when my first was 4. I don't think they actually want to know. They think they are being polite showing an interest but that backfires when they don't get the answer they were expecting.