Hell is being stuck in a room with your relatives

[Upstartcrones]

This is light hearted.

DH has just come back from a visit with extended family and is a bit down in the dumps. Every time its the same, BIL constantly trying to be the 'big I Am' telling you how great/important he is , SIL bitching about everyone including people in the house and basically shit stirring, FIL being infantilised by others as a poor bloke under the control of MIL (truth be told he lets people think this but is actually an enabler) and MIL who I think has dementia but has never been all there.

I've given DH a sick note for next year as a really early Xmas pressie

Is anyone else sick of relatives and do you have these characters in your family??

Can't help but think if Peter Kays 'Uncle Knobhead'

My family are wonderful but 3 days with them over Christmas was enough for me. My brother is the most competitive board game player I’ve ever met. Totally takes all the fun out of everything honestly.

@Upstartcrones dread my own family (other then my mum). Lucky for me they are too far away (long haul flights) for me to ever visit lol. Last seen them 8 years ago and that is still not long enough 😂🤣😂. Will see them in june next year though for my wedding and already anxious lol. Love my fiancé's family though lol such a peaceful fun Christmas.

At least you like them the rest of the year Shirley so don't get the monopoly out at you're sorted

I think I read somewhere the royal family have a certain board game banned at xmas - is that you madge??

I have mil here now (since saturday) and I am seriously on edge with the passive aggressive comments. I pass the time (which is going far too slowly) by plotting midsomer murder ways of killing her. The more elaborate the better. They think I am smiling cos I'm having a nice time.........

I have wireless earphones under my hair and audible, can’t hear DH commentating all day.

Ten minutes in to the festivities this year and thought fuck what have I done. Never again.

I’ve even written it in next years diary for the 1st sept. DECLINE ALL XMAS INVITES AND STAY THE FUCK HOME.

Spent all day trying to cope with the mental torture of knowing my sister is evaluating what I’m wearing, what I’m saying, what my children are saying, how they are behaving. Every time toddler DS did something a standard toddler would do I felt incredibly on edge. Knowing I would be bitched about the minute I left the building.

I was about to start an AIBU titled 'I love my last Christmas guest, and they've done nothing wrong, but WIBU to kill them'.
Reasons:

• have had family of one sort or another round since 22nd
• patio needs levelling
• foibles

Ingenious ideas ladies.

Love the murderous smile, how's your patio these days. Could do with some work

I wonder why people are like this. I think my BIL is massively insecure so has to keep reminding you how great he is just in case you've forgotten in the last 10 minutes. I didn't go to this gathering because as a second wife I ripped up the social ettiquette rule book. I did enough social placating first time round when I was young and eager to please. Second time round nobody was going to put baby in the corner I'm nice to nice people btw its just the rest that can jog on.

Agree 100%. I’d love to be from one of those families where everyone is lovely to be around, they’ve got positive attitudes and they all get on and have a jolly time.

In my family my mum is always looking for ways she’s been slighted, dad doesn’t like anything popular and doesn’t want to watch anything on TV unless is was made in the 1940s and has subtitles, MIL wants to stuff everyone with food they don’t want and gifts they don’t need and FIL likes to ask the same questions over and over until he gets the answer he wants.

At least I’ve got 11 months before we have to get together again 🙄

I’m currently stuck in day #523,899 of MIL’s visit and can feel my mental health unravelling. She offends all senses.

My ears are ringing from her endlessly shrill, shrieking voice, my nostils clenched against her heady scent of methol (ie “healthy”) fags mixed with booze and a whole mess of bad perfume, my eyes trying not to look directly at her so I don’t burn my retinas, my lips trying to contain the vomit when I hear her plant another round of unwanted slobbering kisses on my son, my skin recoiling from her very presence. I want to burn her bra for her because she’s clearly missed the memo on women’s rights and I want to slap the smug look off her face every time she laughs about certain things she thinks are dumb or uncultured about my country compared to hers. This from a woman who spends her days back at home sleeping/boozing/watching crap soaps. End of. The woman has always hated me by default and now I hate her. Interesting how some people avoid those they hate whereas others seek them out for sport.

Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You’re my only hope...

I'm nice to nice people btw its just the rest that can jog on.
A-BLOODY-MEN