Did I jump the queue?

[RobynsMama]

At a service station toilets today. There was a bit of a queue for the toilets maybe 8/9 people in front of me but no one behind. There was a toilet that no one was going in to, it was a bit round the corner and I thought maybe someone hadn’t seen it so I said “that toilet is free” and another lady relied “oh it’s got no lock” but no one moved to use it.

The queue moved forward a bit but I was really desperate and so I just went forward to the toilet with no lock that no one seemed to want to use and went to use it, just pulling it too.

As I was in there I heard a woman tutting, and two of them discussing how rude I was that I’d jumped the queue?? Surely I wasn’t jumping the queue if no one wanted to use the toilet I went into? Or have I broken some kind of toilet etiquette 8 I didn’t know about?

Yetanotherwinter, why do you think the disabled loo might be empty when there's a big queue for the other ones?

Do you think they're ignoring the empty toilet so you can stroll straight in and use it, or do you think...you know they might be saving it for disabled people who can't use the toilet they're queuing for?

There was no queue for THAT toilet, because those in front of you were queueing for other toilets which had working locks, so no, you didn't jump the queue.

Some people have a disability which requires them to use the toilet urgently so It's always fair to leave the disabled toilet open and just wait for the non-disabled one.

You were not unreasonable for using a standard loo that no one in front of you wanted to use because it had no lock. The women were being ridiculous and bitter because you chose to use that loo - nothing to do with queue jumping!

No, you were not unreasonable in the slightest. You told them it was free and they declined to use it so they have no right to be annoyed when you use it.

There was no queue to jump for that toilet.

ProfessionalBoss I assumed the disabled toilet was not exclusively for the disabled but was kit up so it was disabled suitable. Anyway, perhaps the person using it who was not technically disabled would also have wet themselves, or worse. If someone had some sudden onset if explosive diarrhoea, then I believe they are just as deserving as you.

YANBU but don’t worry so much about what random people in toilets think about you.

If they want to stand and wait for a lock that’s up to them. You took action that meant no other toilet goers were harmed and no knickers wet. More power to your elbow OP. Well played.

@damnthatanxiety so she always has explosive diarrhoea? if you don't see the problem with using facilities which are designed FOR disabled people, with your assumptions being wrong, then you too are part of the problem.

As long as you spoke loudly enough to make others in the queue aware, you were perfectly fine to use it.

@RobynsMama

I put YABU to start with, because I thought you had waltzed in and discovered a loo empty, and charged past 8 people.

But when I read your OP properly, I see the people were aware that the loo was free, but wouldn't use it coz there was no lock. So fuk 'em. You did nothing wrong.

(I have changed my vote to YANBU now!)

They probably thought it was un-lady like the gutless wonders. I would have done the same, to hell with them. Reminds me of a story about Sir Christopher Wren when tendering plans to build St Pauls Cathedral. YANBU

@ProfessionalBoss those toilets are not exclusively for disabled people. It just means that they are bigger, more space for wheelchairs etc. I struggle to stand for long periods because I have no cartilage in my hips which is largely why I tend not to queue unless I absolutely have to. I don’t see an issue with this. I’ve never come out of a disabled loo to find anyone waiting.

As long as you spoke loudly enough to make others in the queue aware, you were perfectly fine to use it

I was at the back of the queue so everyone would’ve heard me I think. I don’t know why it riled me up so much, I shouldn’t care about it, but I’m highly strung from spending All of Christmas with difficult relatives 😂

OP is obviously NBU. (Very strange of them to comment! You didn't make their wait any longer, since they weren't going to use the stall with the broken lock.)

Yetanotherwinter, YANBU, either. It makes no sense for people to wait longer than necessary and leave a perfectly good toilet empty for no reason. Mumsnet is the first (and only) place where I've seen it suggested that those toilets are not to be used by people without a disability. My understanding is that they're available to make it easier for people with disabilities-- not that they're designated for their sole use. It's quite different from a parking space.

You'll never see them again. Don t worry about it.

I am not proud of it but I used to use the disabled loo sometimes when shopping alone with dd as she became incredibly distressed when the hand driers came on and so cried and resisted even going in. She was later diagnosed with ASD which explained the problem but I didn't know that at the time so felt very guilty about using them.

Anyway op, you were definitely not being unreasonable!

No. People like tutting.

I'd of done the same.
I wouldnt of on own with a disabled loo

However where I live. There's no public loos. Only cafes or sainsburys.
The cafes x2 both have upstairs loo.. No. Lift for pushchair and 36w pregnant
Sainsburys ladies are laid out funny and can't get pram in cubicle .id more than happ Use an end cubicle with door open ajar normally, but the doors face the main door in sainsburys . No one wants to see that..its full view..

So I do tend to go in disabled if I have pushchair with me and on own.. But that's rare as normally meet with friend or mum

They are the idiots for not using it!

Not queue jumping if none of them wanted to use it anyway.

Sounds like they find thinking hard.

ProfessionalBoss I stand by my statement. Someone who is not disabled but is hit with a bowel emergency is just as needy as a disabled person. Anyway, how would you know if someone was disabled? Not all disabilities are visible

Of course Yanbu but don't be upset,put it out of your mind now.