To think thank you letters are an outdated custom?

[Helloitsmeiwaswondering]

My family have never expected thank you letters, if I open it in front of them I say thank you then, if not, a text or a phone call. I think some people in my family would actually be offended if I felt I had to write them a note.

DH's family definitely expect letters. Tbf it's not just me that has to write them, he does and the kids do too.

The people we are writing to all have internet access, we talk to them regularly by phone, but for some reason, we have to write thank you notes. DH says it's just custom and they'd be offended if we didn't.

AIBU to think that in this day and age, it doesn't matter how you say thank you, as long as you do?

I remember my mum forcing me to write thank you letters and hating it. She still checks up on me to make sure I’ve sent them. I’m 45

Ha ha sounds like my mum (I'm nearly 48).

This is a generational thing I suspect. Personally I think it is very sad that in years to come people who only communicate by email/text/messaging etc and never send/receive a handwritten card or letter sometimes are missing a lot as will future biographers and historians! As for saving paper - use recycled?

If gifts aren't opened in front of the giver then a thank you from the recipient in some form is a definite.

Even when I was a kid my mam just had us phone our aunts etc to thank them for gifts. I'm 52 now so that was a while ago. The only time I would expect a thank you card is for a wedding gift and I wouldn't lose sleep if I didn't get one. I actually got one from a friend before Xmas and realised her wedding was 18 months ago. We just had a laugh about it.

We just write them for elderly extended family who are kind and send the dc gifts.