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If you're divorced/separated how do you divide the Christmas holidays?

9 replies

DtPeabodysFestiveBloomers · 26/12/2019 21:48

For the past 3 Christmases the holidays have been split equally. Christmas Eve all day until mid afternoon on Christmas Day/Christmas Day mid afternoon and all Boxing Day. The remaining days are split equally but ExH gets a block and I get the tail ends. Kids are 11 and 13. The kids and I aren't keen on the arrangement but it's better than splitting it down the middle so we alternate Christmas and new year. We would all hate that. I'm just not good at sharing but it has to be fair. I don't see a better way of doing things so thought I'd ask here to see if there are any we could consider.

OP posts:

Cryingoverspilttea · 26/12/2019 21:51

Not sure but following for reference next year


Harriett123 · 26/12/2019 23:48

We do similar ( Christmas day lunch time swap over) with my stepson and hes 7 but next year it will be swapped to full Christmas days in each of the houses.

As there teenagers / almost teenagers what they want to do will start to become more important. I know alot of adults from split famlies who alternate between houses for Christmas.


UndertheCedartree · 27/12/2019 00:15

My DC's dad isn't worried about having them on Christmas eve/ day/Boxing day/New year. So he had them on 23rd then he'll have them tomorrow and they will have a celebration at his uncle's. I've then got them for the weekend, he's having them Monday and then the Friday and I've got them for the rest of the time. We're very amicable so just work out what suits us best.


Eveting2019 · 27/12/2019 00:21

For us, doing a handover on Christmas Day or close to that just causes stress. I’d rather one parent got to enjoy the festive period with the kids and then the other
For example
We do 20-28th with one, 28-6th with another

If one parent wants to travel they can. Nope had to spend Xmas day or Boxing Day driving.


namechange100002 · 27/12/2019 00:24

Christmas Eve to 27th with dad
27th to new year with mum

We live 4 hours apart so doing a day at a time isn't realistic.

Vice versa next year.
Means we get to spread Christmas out Smile


LellyMcKelly · 27/12/2019 04:24

We all had Christmas together - me, my partner, my ex, and his partner, and it worked brilliantly. It’s taken a lot of work to get to this point, but it was one of the nicest, most relaxing, Christmasses I’ve known. Needless to say the kids absolutely loved it. If the ex and his DP are up for it I’ll definitely do it again next years.


greeneyedlulu · 27/12/2019 04:49

My ex, father to my ds, comes to stay with us on Xmas eve and leaves boxing day but he's single so no other children to consider on his side and he doesn't drive. I now live with my son, partner and new baby. I don't think I could bare Xmas without my son so my ex is welcome here. It's odd but our son is very much loved and doesn't know any different as we split before he was 1. My partner did think it all a bit strange at first but I was very upfront about the whole situation with my ex so it's never caused an issue.


DtPeabodysFestiveBloomers · 27/12/2019 09:54

Lots of different ways. My exH is a nasty abusive man that I don't have any contact with except through my solicitor so there is no way he'd ever be welcome here. His gf is also a nasty abusive piece of work. There are lots of other kids on his side so it gets complicated to arrange everything.
I have a young ds and he would hate not seeing his sisters at Christmas so no chance of alternating.

OP posts:

JagerPlease · 27/12/2019 10:01

First year we tried the handover in the middle of Xmas day but it was stressful for everyone and made the day overwhelming for DC, so have now agreed to alternate (and also do the same with his birthday on opposite years)

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