Is it ever ok to un-invite someone to a party

[pinkoneblueone]

My child is having a party and a friend of theirs was mean to them and ran off with another of their friend and left them alone for a period of time last time they played over. I came along and found my child who is 10 and they were upset so I took her with me as I was going to go out (their dad was at home too). The children arrived back as we were leaving in the car and made excuses but my child was very upset. The child who did this is a bit of a trouble maker. My child has just come to me and said she does not want this child to attend any more. What do we do? Is it ever ok to un-invite someone?

Not under these circumstances, no. Keep an eye on things and make sure everyone plays together nicely at the party. Teach your child resilience.

My dd started secondary this year. She is now at school with a friend she’s known for years. She also made a new friend. All 3 girls are in the same class. A couple of weeks ago the new friend got upset because dd started hanging out more with the other friend. The first child didn’t know this and presumed it was a new friendship and some really nasty things were said between the two girls on social media. My dd didn’t get involved beyond letting the new friend, who started the argument that she was firm friends with the other. It’s all been sorted out now and the 3 girls are getting along brilliantly.

Your dd is 10. As far as possible, don’t get involved. Friendships change and develop a lot at this age. The child you consider the trouble maker may become your dds bestie is secondary or she may never play with her again.

Kids have more dramas than a soap opera but they make up quick. They might be besties again by the time the party swings around.

Shocking that some parents would put their child through a horrible party with another child who has been horrible to them, rather than have a mildly awkward conversation with their parent. I’d 100% uninvite this child and can’t believe some of you wouldn’t! Your poor children.

Poorolddaddypig
Are you usually that much of a drama queen? The children went off and left ops dd for a while. It’s hardly an offence so large that a parent should banish the child from a party and ensure the friendship never survives.

My dds friend has said some awful things to her. She has failure to engage brain before mouth syndrome. Her parents know this. She’s a bit of a trouble maker and from things she’s done a bit of a handful. I had to contact the school when she was in yr5 or 6 because of it. They are still friends. Friendships wax and wane. I have supported dd and she’s worked through things and as a result her boundaries are far stronger. It is far better to teach a child boundaries and negotiating skills than oust a primary aged child from a group.

Whilst what they did wasn't nice it happens all the time and will quickly be forgotten.

If you uninvite the child, then it will be remembered for years. The uninvited child will remember, your child will remember and all the other kids who will get told too will remember.

If she liked her enough to invite her it'll probably all blow over soon.

Perfectly fine. I un-invited my dad to my wedding so it’s definitely ok.

@Poorolddaddypig People have different approaches to parenting. It doesn't mean they aren't good parents.

Yes of course you can.

Girls shouldn’t be taught that they have to put up and be kind even if they’re not comfortable doing so.

I didn't day that it was for a girl or boy. Party went ahead all invited came, NO ONE was uninvited, there were no dramas you all posted valid points and I considered all of them and decided that uninviting would have been unreasonable. Spoke to my child before hand using some of your points as examples and they accepted it everything was fine.

Well done, I'm glad the party went well 😊