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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be pisses off at OH regardless of it being Christmas.

51 replies

SexlessBoulderBelly · 24/12/2019 19:32

we did our Christmas food shop yesterday and while we was there I asked OH if there was anything he fancied for dinner on Christmas Eve. He insisted we didn’t buy anything as we usually get a take away, I’m happy with this as it’s sort of become a bit of a tradition.

Anyway, he hasn’t done any of his Christmas shopping so rushed it today to buy everyone’s presents, including mine that he’s stressed he’s kept the receipts for as he wasn’t sure what to get me, which feels already like he hasn’t put much thought into it.

He’s come home and I’ve asked him what he wants to do for dinner for him to tell me he’s not long had McDonald’s and wasn’t hungry now.

It’s probably hormones but I haven’t eaten since lunchtime as we usually stuff ourselves Christmas Eve with lovely Christmas food and now I don’t have anything here except the stuff for Christmas dinner tomorrow. We haven’t brought our usual weekly shop as we’re so uncertain on when baby’s coming that we’ve been nipping you the shops to get meat and veg taking each day as it comes rather than planning meals ahead.

AIBU that I’m on the verge of tears that my parents are at home with my sister having take away and my brother and his wife are at home having lovely cheeses and nibbles and I’m having a packet of crisps on Christmas Eve. I think I’m mostly upset because it’s always been the way of having something nice tonight and he knows himself that when he does eat he stuffs himself so that he won’t be hungry so why didn’t he have lunch earlier or just have something small so we could still eat together.

Shiteiest Christmas Eve so far Xmas Sad

OP posts:
Clackyheels · 24/12/2019 19:51

Whoah, I think people are being really harsh. I totally get why you're pissed, you both made plans to eat together tonight, on what has become an xmas eve tradition. But he didn't think about you or that and just sorted himself. I'd be pissed. YANBU.

However, I agree that you should order yourself a big takeaway and put your feet up and enjoy it. Put the telly on for company. Fuck him.

Have a goodun

IndecentFeminist · 24/12/2019 19:54

He was hungry and had a MacDonalds. Really not a sign or selfishness, just someone disorganised and hungry. Just order what you want and enjoy it, watch a film together etc

Original poster
SexlessBoulderBelly · 24/12/2019 19:54

He doesn’t want to watch a film as his friends are online so it’s PlayStation night.

I do fancy sticking the grinch on though 😁

OP posts:
Original poster
SexlessBoulderBelly · 24/12/2019 19:55

@mrsbyers oh god, thankfully manful hasn’t hit this house yet. I’m hoping it holds off for a few more weeks at least!

OP posts:
Rose789 · 24/12/2019 19:55

I’m normally starving an hour after having McDonald’s I’m sure he will share your takeaway. If there’s no deliveries in your area send him out to get you some food.
Have a lovely Christmas and best of luck for the baby

AnchorDownDeepBreath · 24/12/2019 19:59

Get a takeaway. It's not lonely, he's right there with you!

vivacian · 24/12/2019 19:59

JustEat is too convenient Blush.

Are you ordering yourself some food? I'm sure you'll feel better for eating.

category12 · 24/12/2019 20:13

You're being ridiculous about not having food in because you might be in hospital for a few days.

What on earth are you going to eat when you come back?! You're not going to be fit to go shopping and you probably won't want him bogging off to shop that much either.

Original poster
SexlessBoulderBelly · 24/12/2019 20:14

He was sentenced to town to get me something to eat. He’s sorry.. I know that because he’s come back with chocolate buttons which are my weakness... and a fish pie so will stick that in the oven, have a lavender bath and get into bed with grinch on the telly.

I think I’m overly tired after a day of cleaning and prepping for tomorrow. Why do I, and whoever else does the same, make Christmas un-necessarily stressful? Like I’ve never made orange and port red cabbage in my life.. why have I done it just for Christmas?!😂

OP posts:
StillCoughingandLaughing · 24/12/2019 20:14

That’s totally reasonable for me to get my own take away so I suppose I’m just being a bit hormonal, but it’s not the same having a take away by myself and that feels more lonely than not eating at all Xmas Sad

Okay, you’re heavily pregnant and hormonal... but can you really not hear how wet that sounds? Just order the bloody takeaway!

ArranUpsideDown · 24/12/2019 20:15

Whatever you choose, have a lovely takeaway, OP.

Lots of good wishes for the upcoming birth.

Original poster
SexlessBoulderBelly · 24/12/2019 20:23

@category12 I don’t know Blush we’ve had so many complications that we don’t know if we’re coming or going. My general thinking was to send him to do a big shop when we get home at some point... but yeah actually I might not want him to leave me alone for that long a period? It’s our first baby so I have absolutely no idea how it’s going to pan outSmile will rethink about maybe getting some frozen ready meals in and some long life thing I could chuck into pasta.

OP posts:
ArranUpsideDown · 24/12/2019 20:27

getting some frozen ready meals in and some long life thing I could chuck into pasta.

Both good ideas - and may I recommend Newman's Own Tomato & Basil if that's a combination that you like? It's pretty much the only pre-made sauce that doesn't taste like soap to me.

category12 · 24/12/2019 20:31

Do that, get some stuff in. It's unlikely either of you will want to put much effort into cooking in the first few weeks and ready-meals may be a lifesaver. You're probably going to want him close by, and you may not be very mobile. I remember being fairly terrified with my first and not wanting to be on my own.

Original poster
SexlessBoulderBelly · 24/12/2019 20:31

@ArranUpsideDown thank you I will definitely give that a go, I find a lot of tomatoey pasta sauces have a weird tang to them that puts me off. Although tomatoes and basil are one of my favourites so will go by your recommendation.. but I’m sure I’ll be too busy to even care about taste once we’re all home and settling 😊

OP posts:
matchamamma · 24/12/2019 20:32

Why do I, and whoever else does the same, make Christmas un-necessarily stressful? Like I’ve never made orange and port red cabbage in my life.. why have I done it just for Christmas?!

I thought I was the only one, OP! It was mini quiche for me this year Grin Glad you've got your dinner sorted. All the best with the upcoming birth! Flowers

BeanTownNancy · 24/12/2019 21:05

Obviously, you're being a bit silly but I completely understand why you're upset.

Your husband told you not to get any food in because you would get a takeaway then he decided to eat so much food that he wasn't going to be hungry for dinner, not considering what his heavily pregnant wife was going to eat. That's a dick move. At least he's apologetic.

joystir59 · 24/12/2019 21:11

I had a crisp sandwich for tea made with thickly buttered soft bread. Yum!

Original poster
SexlessBoulderBelly · 24/12/2019 21:15

@joystir59 that is my ultimate ‘poorly’ snack. So easy to make when you’re not feeling well and the more you flatten it the tastier it becomes!

OP posts:
Butterymuffin · 24/12/2019 21:20

Just order a shopping delivery. The baby could come late and then you'll have been traipsing to the shop every day for weeks, which will have cost you more than a possible couple of days of wasted food.

Wonkybanana · 24/12/2019 21:32

It sounds like your OH is generally thoughtless, which is making what might otherwise be something small into something much bigger.

He hasn't bothered to get you a present (I bet you've got him something despite being about to give birth).

He ate the McDonald's so now he's not hungry, spoiling the plans (which he absolutely knew about) for the evening. At very best that was thoughtless, at worst selfish.

Even though it's Christmas Eve, his PlayStation night takes priority.

That would be enough to have anyone pissed off, let alone someone who's about to have a C section any day.

Enjoy your food and your bath, and make sure he's a model OH tomorrow.

mummyway · 24/12/2019 21:41

Op have you spoken to your husband and asked why he changed plans and didn't bother to update you. If you knew he was stuffing his face you could have asked him to pick something up for you. His lack of Consideration is what should make you angry.

chocolatemademefat · 25/12/2019 00:08

YABU not having any food in. What’s your husband supposed to eat while you’re in hospital? Don’t you have a fridge?

NoCleanClothes · 25/12/2019 00:11

I would definitely order yourself a take away.

NoCleanClothes · 25/12/2019 00:11

*would have