To think it weird they don’t get/send anything?

[Sundancer77]

We don’t live in the uk and will be having our Christmas as a family where we are with Dd, 17 months.
My parents gave us some money for their gd’s Christmas presents etc when they last came over, my brother and sister sent gifts, our friends the same and even neighbours we don’t know that we’ll kindly gave small gifts.
It really isn’t about the gifts themselves, but is it normal for a baby girl’s mil, sil, bil etc to not send any gifts, money or even a card? They say they have no money, they aren’t wealthy, neither are my family, but they still all buy for one another? Would that piss you off/upset you?

Celebrate the differences OP.

No, not really. My children don't get gifts from my DF side of the family. Not a card either. Never crossed my mind to be pissed off about it. I just enjoy my Christmas

I’m confused - who is it that doesn’t send gifts/cards? Your partner’s family?

Partners family, yeah. Not pissed off really, just to find it unusual 🤷‍♀️

And a little sad for my Dd if I’m honest (although obviously at this age, she has no clue 😂) but perhaps if it remains the same when she’s older.

I think it’s unusual not to get your grandchild a present yes.

Nah, could just be cultural difference.

Do you mean baby girl's grandparents, aunts and uncles? I don't suppose a 17 month old has a mil.

I would think most gps send their gcs Xmas and birthday presents, I don't know any that don't . My
dds have aunts and uncles who don't usually send Xmas presents. This is on dh's side. I'm an only child but my aunts and uncles have given my Xmas and birthday presents.

maybe they think it costs too much to post abroad.

If they say they don't have the money, that's fair enough.

@halcyondays Ha ha, sorry, yes, my mil, she obviously doesn’t have one yet, rushing typing it before.

@Ridiculousanx Not cultural differences as we’re all from the same background/area, we moved away. They buy for each other I’m definitely guessing, did in the past at least.

Maybe they are saving up to come over and visit in a few years, much better seeing family every few years than sending token gifts each year.

My DS' grandparents, aunties and uncles never acknowledge his birthday or Christmas. They walk past us in the street too. I am annoyed that people who are supposed to love him seemingly don't give a shit, but at the same time it's their loss. He has plenty of presents and love. Basically fuck them if she's not important enough.

DH’s family haven’t bought DD Xmas or birthday presents for 7 years now. We live 200 miles away. I think it’s out of sight, out of mind for them even though she’s the first grandchild. They buy for the local grandchildren/cousins etc. One BIL will always treat DD when he sees her (a day out/ice cream etc) which I think is lovely. The others just ignore it.

Outcome is that we barely see them anymore. Their loss.

My dad doesn’t really do Christmas. Dc have never said anything. They write him a card and make a gift but never expect anything in return.

My brother and sil will only give gifts to DC if they're actually going to be seeing them (likewise we only give gifts when we're actually seeing the adults). It works fine for us as DC always have lots of stuff and DH and I don't need more stuff! I'm more surprised that your random neighbours sent you stuff!

@IamFriedspam Not really random, the ones across the street have given a present for Dd and our dog (they love her 🤷‍♀️😂) and the next door neighbours (holiday home) are quite obsessed with Dd (in a sweet way)
That’s why I not exactly expect but was used to in my own upbringing etc, my grandma giving me a Christmas and birthday present 🤷‍♀️

Oh right I thought you meant your old neighbours - that's sweet of the new neighbours!

I know! very unexpected and kind of them