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Tik Tok

14 replies

eryn6556 · 24/12/2019 00:12

DD only just turned 11 and wants to download Tik Tok on her iPad. Her iCloud is set up so that she has to ask permission to download apps.
AIBU to not allow it? She has been asking for months and I have treated it like any other Social Media platform (Instagram, Snapchat where you have to be 13+). Tik Tok you also have to be 13 but I know many people in her class at school have it which is the only reason why I'm considering it as she has often come home from school or play dates very upset because they've been talking about or making Tik Toks and she hasn't been able to join.
I have DD15 and DD17 also who have social media which hasn't helped.

OP posts:

SeeingThePyramids · 24/12/2019 00:17


OhCumInMyFaceful · 24/12/2019 00:17

My DD12 has had it since she was 11, she uses it to make videos with her art and cartoons. I have an account and can see what she sees.


StinkyWizleteets · 24/12/2019 00:20

If you set up rules and teach her about why they’re needed, ensure she only adds people she knows in real life (or even have you approve), gives you full access to her phone and apps, never post identifying info (school uniforms/ties/outside the house etc) then why not?

Rather than ban it, especially when all her peers have it, teach her how to be online responsibly.

My daughter uses it at 10 and the stuff she makes is amazing but I have full access anytime. Also worth setting up your own account to follow her.


AlpacaGoodnight · 24/12/2019 00:20

This is one of the worst apps for grooming so there is no way I would let my child have it.


outherealone · 24/12/2019 00:24

@alpaca please can you outline more ref grooming? I think we might have discussed this app more on another thread ref photos but I’ve just let my little girl join, I’ve only let her add two friends and disabled comments, I am so far behind all the new soc media apps I really don’t want her to be excluded from her friends out of school as has always been very introverted and is now being bullied, I feel like she needs this interaction with her kind friends to help her to have some positive and fun social experiences when at home, I have disability and her dad lives in the country so she doesn’t get much peer contact outside of school


outherealone · 24/12/2019 00:28

Wow @SeeingThePyramids thanks very much for the link. Scary stuff. I’ll look into it all properly tomorrow


AlpacaGoodnight · 24/12/2019 00:34

@outherealine there are numerous articles online about it, but a real life situation I know of due to my job happened where a man was pretending to be a 12 year old local boy. A few children added him as he was in the local vicinity and then more as he was 'a friend of a friend' even though no one had actually met him. Luckily it didn't go too far as the police found out what was going on, but there was a very upset/terrified group of girls when the police showed up to chat about it and some very upset/shocked parents who thought that at least one of the others 'knew' the 'boy' in real life. The man was a convicted paedo who had already spent time in jail and if the police hadn't caught on to what he was doing (I can't remember being told how they tracked him) the outcome could have been much worse.


AlpacaGoodnight · 24/12/2019 00:35

@outherealone if you research properly you may be able to let her use it safely with full checking by you but personally not a risk I could take


SquashedFlyBiscuit · 24/12/2019 00:35

We've not allowed it for my 11 year old as far too aware of the dangers - but it does seem common in her year.


eryn6556 · 24/12/2019 00:38

Thanks everyone - seems like generally it's a no.
My concerns weren't necessarily people seeing her videos as she would have a private account and only accept friends. I would also have an account and follow her to monitor this as well.
I was more worried at the content she would be exposed to as the stuff on there isn't regulated and I have seen some inappropriate ones that my older DC's have shown me that I don't want my younger DD to be exposed to.

OP posts:

YouOnlyLiveTwice · 24/12/2019 00:40



QuindariusGooch · 24/12/2019 01:59

My DD is 17 and I refuse to let her have any sort of social media because our family and culture don’t see it as necessary. That being said, you’re being unreasonable and let her get tik tok


BillHadersNewWife · 24/12/2019 02:01

One of my DD's friends (15) suddenly got about 15,000 followers overnight and her Mum is freaked out!

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