Christmas chickenpox

[Mandatorymongoose]

DS (6yrs) has never had chickenpox. DM has just let me know that SiLs youngest has come out in spots today, pretty sure it's chickenpox.
We are all supposed to be having Christmas together at DMs.

AIBU (or a bit precious maybe?) to not want to go? I know DS will probably get it at some point and it's maybe better when he's younger but it doesn't feel like the right thing to deliberately expose him.

There are no other children going, just SiLs 2 and my DS. All the adults have already had it.

SIL shouldn't be taking a child with chicken pox out. I wouldn't go if they are going

I wouldn't go given how seriously unwell my friend's daughter was with chicken pox. She ended up in hospital.

Well, I couldn't go anyway being immune suppressed, but I think some people are a bit too relaxed over chicken pox sometimes.

I remember when I was younger, people purposefully had "chicken pox parties" as it is much better to have it while younger.

I am guessing times have changed since then!

Yes they have sunshine. I wouldn't go.

Chickenpox parties still exist....

I’ve seen a few of people I know in fb telling others to come round as their kids have pox.

Realistically, SIL shouldn’t be coming round but I doubt that would happen.

So I would avoid it myself tbh.

Both of mine have had pox now. Dd flew through, but poor ds had it terrible and needed antibiotics. He still has scarring on his face from them

Avoid like the plague. Children can die from chicken pox. FYI OP, there is a CP Vaccine.

I'd advise vaccinating your DS.

Perfectly reasonable to say you won't go. They should really ask you how you feel about it, and offer to stay home themselves rather than inform you.

I certainly wouldn't be going.

Its ridiculously unfair taking a child with chickenpox out to a "party". They can be so very ill. The last thing id imagine you'd want is to be in a house full of relatives surrounded by food, tv/music and chatter, your be aching, itchy and tired and would want to be lying on the sofa quietly at home. I'd think they were being rather selfish if they go.

SIL should stay at home! I've just had to lose a fortune at a lovely 5* hotel five minutes from home because my daughter has come out in chicken pox! I thought she'd had them as a younger baby as I've got a very poor immune system and get recurring shingles, only a tiny patch on the same arm at least 3 times a year...it's more inconvenient than anything else now-but figured I'd already been through this!! I'd hate to pass the virus on to another family especially if they were immune compromised during the holidays. We have a responsibility to our own children but to society too! I hate it when I find out parents have sent their LO into nursery knowingly with a tummy bug. My LO just wants cuddles for starters and it's so selfish to put not just the kids and families at risk but staff too!!
I hope your SIL develops some common sense. Christmas dinner is basically a Sunday dinner after all

I think you are reasonable not to go (in all honesty it should be her staying home) because of how close they are from developing - he will still be infectious (and probably miserable)

I admit though when my son came out in spots on the 19th a few years back we still went to my parents on boxing day - however by then all the scabs were healed over and I did ask others who were coming

SIL should keep her child at home, he or she will be feeling miserable in a couple of days' time. It's not on to bring a poxy DC to a gathering where not everyone is immune.

On a tangent, get the vaccine if you can afford it. £120 for 2 doses, lifetime immunity.

@beccasfirstbump has your GP not given you the shingles vaccine yet? It prevents about 90% of recurrences.

Is shingles vaccine not for over 70s?

They should be the ones to stay at home, not you. Not all children do feel miserable with chickenpox, mine were ok, but obviously we wouldn't have taken them to someone's house to spread it.

Ah you've brought back the memories from 10 years ago when DS's preschool inadvertently had an old school chickenpox party when they invited all the morning and afternoon children to meet Santa at the Christmas party - it was a bloody miserable Christmas for us and then the preschool was deserted for a few weeks afterwards as loads of kids came down with it.

Another vote for the vaccine here. It's cost us £110 but worth every penny if we get to avoid the misery and possible scarring and complications, not to mention inconvenience, of chicken pox! Loads of pharmacies do it now, had no probs finding one when my DD was 9mo.

But yes I wouldn't go if they are determined to come.

I would not risk it!

We are missing our holiday home to NZ as DS (3 years) caught the pox on Thursday for the 2nd time. If I had known he wasn't immune after the first time he caught it (mild case when 13 months old), I would have got him vaccinated.

I’ve got to be honest, I would risk it. Because yes, whilst people can be very seriously ill from chicken pox, the vast majority of people are not. The chances of your child being seriously ill from minuscule are tiny. A quick google tells me that 25 people a year die from chickenpox, and the vast majority of those will have an underlying condition. You have got far far more chance of being killed as you drive over on Christmas Day.

It's not just that a dc may become very unwell with chickenpox, it's also that they may come into contact with someone with a compromised immune system or a pregnant woman. It's best to limit the spread of chickenpox as much as you can.

Definitely get the vaccine if you can afford it, there is absolutely no requirement to get chickenpox.

Get your child vaccinated. chickenpox can get properly awful !

Well that's a general consensus not to go.

I actually looked at the vaccine a few months ago after a thread on here kicking myself a bit for not going and getting it done then but hindsight is a wonderful thing.

Emergency Christmas shop time.