Seatbelts and SIL's

[Temp123999]

I've name changed as it's vey outing.
I'm in African on holiday with DH and DC who are both 10 yrs old we have been here a few times.
Staying with SIL who is lovely and has two older kids also lovely.
Problem is other two SIL's who are based in UK and are staying also (massive house and we have the guest suite 2 bedrooms two bathrooms)
Anyway decided to go see PIL's a 30 min drive oldest SIL announced she would join us although she has been here for 2 weeks and seen them several times.
I explained there was no room in cab but she insisted me her and DC could sit in back as DD is quite small she could sit on either her or my lap without a seatbelt I refused she then tried to convince DH who suggested two taxis, she ended up getting a lift and arrived 20 mins after us and proceeded to dominate conversation speaking to PIL's DH and family friend in local language which neither me or kids understand.
When it was time to leave she announced loudly that she would share our taxi as her friend had left PIL though this was a good idea I said wasn't happy due to no seatbelt for DD.
DH arranged two taxis she didn't want to travel alone so to avoid making a scene I went with her and DS in first taxi and DH and DD went in second.
When we got home I could tell she had already discussed with her sisters what happened as they were not surprised that DD and DH were not with us and also other UK based SIL and her were obviously talking about me.
AIBU to insist on DC wearing seatbelts and to find her overbearing.

YANBU!
This is the reason why we have laws in the UK. Because people are generally thick, don't take responsiblity for their own safety and think accidents won't happen to them.

Ask her how she'd feel if she walked away from an accident that killed DD?

She’s a bit thick to try and persuade you twice, you clearly wouldn’t agree. Yanbu to insist on a seat belt.

@Blackbear19
@TestingTestingWonTooFree
Both SIL's Have lived in UK for all adult life over 30 years and have young adult DC's
Oldest visiting for first time since leaving but is an expert on all things local.
Although I'm uk born from immigrant parents I've visited this country around 7 times fortunately never before with older SIL as she's changed whole dynamics and is sucking the joy from holiday😔

What does DH think? Does she behave this badly when he’s there?

@TestingTestingWonTooFre
She's generally frustrated in UK and now she's here she's bossing her sisters household help and generally being a pain unfortunately none of the siblings stand up to her.

DC wearing seat belts is non negotiable. That would be my broken record reply every time is came up.

Where in Africa are you? The reason why a lot of Asian and African countries don’t have laws around child seats is because it’s often not possible to go over 10-20 miles per hour due to poor quality roads / traffic etc.

Yanbu

And a big well done to your dh for being decent and standing your ground with you xxx

There are statistics on crashes and fatalities for all countries. As far as I remember the highest ones are in places where seatbelts and motorcycle helmets are not legally required. Like third world countries.

I’d be insisting too. You did the right thing.

What does your dh have to say about his sister being an idiot

@Butterymuffin
Yep just told my Nephew whose lovely that he can't take my twins plus their two cousins ( Non seatbelt SIL's kids) in his car for ice cream if he's also giving his brother a lift.
He's fine 20 year old has booked Uber and turned down offer to pay but two SIL's eye rolling and twins complaining I'm embarrassing them.
DH is out.
It's so frustrating as they don't seem to get it despite being well educated individuals.

YANBU depending on where you are in Africa road traffic accidents are a very significant danger, I wouldn't have DC in the car without seat belts in England either though.

@GrumpyHoonMain
In probably one of the safest and prosperous Country in Africa with terrible road safety issues.
I use seatbelts in UK where road safety is better as do SIL's so find it hard to understand the cavalier attitude as we're on Holiday

Why not indulge in some drink driving and letting the DC’s indulge in some smoking?! Oh yeah, l forget they are all ridiculous! YANBU she’s being reckless and unreasonable. She really shouldn’t be dragging you or your children into it

Thanks for all replies.
Unfortunately I think it's also DH problem as although he's mostly supportive of our two when his older two sisters and his Mum get together they continually derail every decision we make for our children.