Aibu in being upset ?

[meowmeow]

First time poster here.

I have an ill relative who yesterday tried to attack me. They have an mental impairment. The only reason for their attack was that I asked them to give me a screwdriver from a place I could not reach, to which they replied to me in an aggressive way, I walked away from the verbal abuse and because I didn’t retaliate they came lunging at me with a clenched fist.

My dh was home, although he didn’t see it, he heard the commotion. He didn’t ask me if I was ok. In fact this reminded me of when my car was broken in too and the police couldn’t attend so I had to drive home sitting on the broken glass on the way home and even then he didn’t ask if I was ok. I have dcs with this man. I mentioned several times yesterday of how he didn’t even bother to ask or check if I am ok. To which I got no response. I’m shocked and hurt.

His response to the incident was ‘he didn’t actually hit you though did he’

Am I being unreasonable in actually feeling shocked ?

YANBU.

Is he normally inconsiderate?

It’s strange but he is caring, but yes in those terms he is inconsiderate. He starts acting like a victim himselfz

He sounds very inconsiderate but you did not have to drive home sitting on broken glass, you could have cleared it up yourself.

I cleared it as much as I could. It was still impossible to get the little shards out with my bare hands. That could only be done until I got home and used a brush as well as a vacuum.

I bet if you start really thinking about it OP, you'll start to realise other ways he's not nice. My stbexh acts the utter arse any time I am ill/sick/stressed/worried, because god forbid he should have to divert his attentions from anyone other than himself

You say he's not normally an uncaring wanker, so why do you think this happens? Does he feel you're playing the victim? Is there history over the person who tried to hit you?

It's quite deliberate to not ask you how you are even when you've outright mentioned a few times that he hasn't. He isn't forgetting, he's making a point. What point, and is it a reasonable one?

YANBU is this usual for him? It just seems so odd. If I happened to be in a neighbour's house and that happened I would be sure to check they were OK, let alone my partner and parent to my kids.