Miscarrying my baby, irrational fear of losing my child?

[VeeJayBee]

I’m currently miscarrying my baby. I was 8 weeks pregnant. It’s my first (hopefully last) miscarriage. It started on Thursday. It’s a horrible thing. A fear of losing my 2 year old DD seems to have crept up on me. Like, literally losing her, someone taking her. My DH wants to take her out this afternoon as his family are visiting in the town where we live for some Christmas fair thing. I’ve found them always to be a bit blaze when it comes to looking after their own kids, I’ve always been a safety nut. I’m beginning to seriously worry and not trust he’ll keep his eyes on her, I’ve asked him to use the reigns, and be extra careful - in my opinion you should always be extra careful. I’m so scared someone will take her and don’t know how I’m going to let them go without me, let her out of my sight. I feel maybe losing this baby is heightening my fear of losing her. I’d kill myself if anything happened to her. Has anyone else felt like this who lost a baby to miscarriage or am I going crazy?

No, you are absolutely not going crazy. Going through a mc is awful and I think your feelings are understandable.

Oh bless you OP so sorry for your loss. I don't have much advice but just want to let you know that I feel similar about my DS, despite not being through an experience similar to yours. I don't really trust anyone with him. I think many mums feel the same way and your current experience is probably heightening that natural inherent feeling. I'm sure it'll settle down again for you xx

I had 4 miscarriages before having DS, so I don't know what it's like with a child, but I'd definitely understand wanting to keep your DD close at such an upsetting time.

Give yourself space to be upset and let any upsetting thoughts pass. The sudden drop in pregnancy hormones can be like super PMS, and this is before you factor in that you are grieving.

Though it may take a while to process what has happened, you will probably feel better once the miscarriage is over. I remember waking up a week after my first one feeling like a storm had past and everything in my head was clear.

Miscarriages are so common. It's unlikely you'll be here again. Look after yourself really well and expect to feel somewhat better next week

It’s so hard. Take it easy, this fear is normal. Get some rest and let others help you right now.

It’s a perfectly normal response. I’ve had MCs and they have made me feel the same way about my children.

Take care of yourself, it takes time to process x

It is common to feel that way. I had a dd then 2 mc and then a ds. After the mc I just wanted to hug my dd all the time.

I’m so sorry for your loss.

I'm so sorry for your loss.It's a completely normal reaction, you need to know your daughter is safe and at the moment the only way your head can process that is if she is by your side. You will get through this and keep your daughter close for now as it will keep the panic away.

I'm sorry for your loss
It's very common to feel this way.
I had a miscarriage at 8w and I've had a TFMR and the fear of losing my 4yo is horrible.

Sorry for your loss

I think it's totally normal to feel anxious. Your hormones are all over place, your emotions are all over the place and you most likely feel physically crap too. My daughter was the centre of my heightened anxiety too when I went through the same. My husband kept wanting to take her to the in laws so I could recover in peace, but I couldn't bear for her to be far from me, I had to keep her close.

Give yourself some time, it's all so raw right now. I personally found it did get better in time but there's still that little shadow in the back of my mind

Thank you very much everyone, your comments have been really helpful to make me feel like I’m not being crazy and kind words are very comforting. And i think it’s helped for my husband to see the comments to not feel so offended at my feeling scared to leave her at the moment even if it’s with him. Thanks again, this has been really helpful.