Disagreeing with OH need advice

[Pineapplebaby]

More of a ‘what would you do’ than a ‘AIBU’; we have our 20 week scan in a few weeks and whilst we’ve agreed we would like to find out the gender, my OH wants to keep it secret from everyone whereas I want to tell people.
I did agree to the secret thing at first as it would be nice to have something that only we know, but now I’m excited at the thought of telling people.
AIBU at wanting to share the news or should I stick to the original plan of keeping it to ourselves? Assuming the little peanut cooperates of course! Thanks.

I would talk to my DH and tell him I want to tell people and come to an agreement.

Yanbu to want to share and, let’s be honest, as it’s only ever going to be an either/or situation, it’s not going to be a huge surprise for anyone unless you give birth to an alpaca.

TBF i think its rubbish when people tell me in advance what they are having. My line of thinking is.. ok i know you are preggers. I know you are having a baby. It can only be one or the other. You get the fun of feeling the baby move etc. Let me have fun at guessing what you are having. When its anounced we can all be pleased at what you have had .
In work the reaction is so different for those who have told and those who havent. Those who have told everyone get a reaction of ... oh right. She has had him\ her im glad they are ok. But its always kind of flat.
Whereas with those who havent everyone is always so excited to hear the news they run to the staffroom to hear and see picsand there just seems more of a buzz and chat with people being genuinely excited and pleased at the news and shouts of .. see i was right all along.
But thats just my opinion. And its your pregnancy so your prerogative how and what you tell people. Congratulations

I think finding out but not telling people rather superior. if you don't want to tell people make it a surprise for yourselves too.

I'm the opposite to the above poster...I think other than very close family, people dont really care what other people have or dont have. Whether you told me at 20 weeks or 20 weeks later, it makes absolutely no difference to me. It's easier to buy gifts when you know in advance. So just do whatever you two want to do, dont consider other people.

One thing though if you do decide to keep it a secret, you will have to lie and say you havent found out. Saying 'I know but am keeping it a secret', I have read on other threads on here, really pisses people off. Nothing makes people more frustrated than 'I've got a secret but I'm not telling you!'

Besides close friends and family not many people bother about being told.. they might ask but I sometimes think that’s a politeness thing. I’d discuss it with him though because once you know there’s always the inevitable “he/she” slip or buying something that’s not neutral... I knew it was a boy hadn’t told some family (hadn’t seen them wasn’t due for ages) and their feckin cleaner was the one who saw me loading a baby blue pram into the car.. she assumed they knew n told them she loved the “little mans pram”, they were a tad miffed.

You are finding out sex not gender. And noone really cares (possible grandparents aside) as much as you two do?

Tell, don't tell.

Maybe just get through the anomaly scan first. Then decide.
Who knows they may not be able to tell you the sex on the day.

Close friends and family will be pleased to hear, everyone else probably won’t care that much.