Are second births usually easier?

[2ndtimer30]

I'm nearly 33 weeks pregnant with DC2 and have been pretty relaxed but suddenly The Fear about childbirth has set in.

DC1 was back to back and had a large head (runs in my family), but despite that birth was only 6.5 hours though so not too bad. Had episiotomy and second degree tear but recovery was actually pretty quick.

I know that nothing is certain in the crazy world of pregnancy and childbirth. But please tell me that second births are usually easier? That's true, right?! Do I have a lower chance of instrumental/emergency c section now I've had one baby?

Any tips on how I can be more positive about birth and not ruin these last few weeks of pregnancy? On scans this baby also has a big head just like her sister and it's terrified me even though I've done it all before...

It will be quicker probably but probably not any less painful.
I agree with other posters, the after effects of the second birth were worse- especially hip pain ever since which numerous operations have failed to sort out 20 years later!

So much quicker second time around and mentally I felt much more prepared for what was going to happen.

With both my births my waters broke but no contractions. With DS, I was induced and had a difficult 17 hour labour ending in a ventose delivery and episiotomy. I was honestly very frightened the whole time and I think that had a big impact on progress as by the end I was exhausted and almost fought against the pushing urges which didn't help.

Second time around, waters broke, had a few period pain style contractions over the course of the day. Relaxed at home and rested as much as possible before going back to hospital for the induction that evening. Contractions ramped up a bit in the car. Was examined and found to be 5cm dilated at 9pm. DD born at 11.24pm and other than the afterpains which were much worse this time round I didn't need painkillers and was up and about a lot quicker.

I found what helped me was trying some hypnobirthing techniques and listening to some hypnobirthing tracks in the run up to giving birth. I definitely wasn't able to block out the pain and get myself into a hypnotised state but I was much calmer. I'd recommend Hollie De La Cruz 'Your Baby, Your Birth' as I found the MP3s that came with the book the most calming.

There’s no normal OP, my second baby was later, longer labour, I lost blood, my first was a breeeze!!! It is what it is. Try not to think about it. Just relax and go with the flow. Get ideas and expectations only leads to the possibility of feeling let down or out of control.

Loads easier, I felt much more in control and I knew what to expect. Lovely, straightforward home birth with it snowing outside and family downstairs .....had stitches in hospital afterwards but so euphoric I didn’t mind at all . You’ll do brilliantly and everything will be fine!

My first was the easiest, strangely.
The after pains with the subsequent ones though, Jesus!
I wouldn't have minded if someone had warned me so I could have packed relevant pain relief.
I asked my mum why she didn't warn me and she said that she didn't want to frighten me?!?!?

I arrived at hospital at 10 cm, had my waters broken and 20 minutes later I had ds2. Just gas and air.
Ds1 was back to back, so had to push for 2 and a half hours ending up with an episiotomy. Had pethidine and gas and air.

Usually, yes.

Just thought I'd come back to this thread to update.

DD2 was born in February, contractions started at 2am, arrived at hospital at 4.30am and was already 8cm dilated , baby born in the pool at 6.30am.

Minimal tearing, home by 2pm!

I'm now wondering about having a third so may start a thread about third births at some point...I hear they're a whole other kettle of fish...

First was awful, second I didn’t even realise I was in labour and thanks to a lovely family member who thought I had a UTi I managed to get to hospital on time. Baby was in seven minutes of pushing and he is a big lad!!

Amazing update. Enjoy the baby!!

DC1 was back to back, 30 hour labour and forceps delivery. DC2 was born just 3 hours after we arrived at hospital with gas and air which I only needed when I was 10cm dilated. I couldn't believe how much easier it was!

First labour 4 hours 40 mins - induced. Quite a bad tear. 8lb 13

Second labour 1 hour 3 min - not induced. Was v intense as everything happened so so quickly. But easier birth and recovery than first. No stitches. 9lb 6

1st - 24 hours b2b, ventouse, awful.
2nd - 4.5 hours, manageable until crowning!!
3rd - 4 hours but b2b and awful tear. Nightmarish.

My labours for first and second were identical, both induced for waters breaking but no labour. Both failed epidurals.

First was 28 hours, second was 18 hours.
Main difference - and it's a big difference, active labour for DS2 is down as 40 minutes. From 4cm to placenta delivered - 40 minutes. Whereas DS1 was textbook 1cm dilated every hour, but still only 10 minutes of pushing.

Trust your body, you know how giving birth feels. My midwife did not believe me when I told her I needed to push because less than half an hour before that I was only 4cm. When she checked and saw I was crowning, she panicked and called out for the second midwife. DS2 was delivered 2 minutes later.

In fact, DH arrived with the second midwife. He'd been sent home because nothing was happening. He called me accidentally, I answered apparently half mooing half crying and remembered that's exactly how I sounded just before I had DS1 so hot foot it to the hospital.

First was a drug-free birth, no tearing, no complications and I went home a few hours later.

Second birth I had gestational diabetes, so was induced, which involved pessaries, walking the corridors for hours, breaking my waters, and finally Pitocin, which again led to a vaginal birth with no tearing, but it was a more fraught experience.

All births are different. Some will be the same. You won't know until it happens. Can guarantee the after pains get worse with each child, especially if you breastfeed!

Mine was 5 hours. No pain relief. Was fine.

My first one took days, had an epidural, ventouse and a tear. Second one, 8 hours all in all, no intervention, no tear, was so much easier. Partly me and my body knew what to expect, partly he was smaller. Literally everyone I know had an easier 2nd birth.

Just realised you had updated op and your baby is 5 months old! Glad it went well

I've had 4 children and currently expecting my 5th.
First birth, easier to manage than the second. Was a long 48 hour labour and was induced. Very difficult delivery and not too bad recovery.
Second birth, long 48 hour labour again, was induced with a pessary and a drip to bring it on quicker. I hate the drip. Was awful back to back contractions. Very easily delivery though as she was just 5lbs and didn't even hurt when it came time to push. Recovery was difficult due to the after pains!
Third birth, managed to labour majority of it at home as again slow, long labour. Went to hospital when contractions started getting stronger. Was given pethidine and then sort of dozed a bit until I was 7cm and then took gas and air and went into the birthing pool. Absolutely fantastic. My best labour yet! A total of 36 hours but was worth it. Recovery time wasnt too bad and I don't remember the after pains being too bad too.
Fourth birth, which is my last baby girl born in 2018. Such a long awful labour. Contractions started at 2am, managed them for a bit at home. Husband came in from work and we dropped the kids off to my aunts roughly 6 or 7am, went to hospital but was only 1cm so they sent us home. Stayed home for the day playing puzzles, word games and watching tv with hubby. Got to evening and they had slowed down so husband suggested to go and get kids. Went to collect the kids and the contractions started up again, went back to hospital and was 3cm , was given pethidine bit it didn't work as well as last time. Was about 4cm and brought to the labour ward from antenatal ward. Then at 5cm wentnto the birth pool which was a real relief, it just makes you feel so light and relaxed. Baby just didn't want to come . By this time it was about 28 hours in labour . Was told couldn't go back in the water birthing pool. Totally gutted. Midwife popped my waters and that helped to speed things up but then baby was stuck at an awkward position and I was in bloody agony. They were going to put me on the dreaded drip to help speed up again. Then I needed the toilet. Turns out the walk to the loo and back helped the baby shift back into the birth canal. Pushed her out in a matter of 2 minutes as literally had enough. Was so weak and exhausted I didn't get that bonding with her as I was so drained. I was vomiting too from the gas and air. Blood and sick. And was just so weak and wobbly. 32 hours of labour but again so worth it. Shes now 2 and just a little sweety pie.

I think the easiest was my 3rd. My hardest was my 2nd and 4th. Hoping 5th will be easier I'm just dreading a long labour again and the hideous after pains.

Does anyone else have really long or really short labours! I feel no matter how many children I have, it will be days lol. My body just does long labours! But relatively quick deliveries!

@Squashpocket oh my goodness, yes I have to add with my 2nd and 4th child , they were really bad. Especially with my 4th I was struggling to cope. The after pains are when the womb is trying to get and shrink back to its normal size. The more children you have the harder it has to work. They are a combination of contractions and period cramps. With my 4th they were that bad I even asked the midwife for gas and air!! Haha! Bow I'm expecting our 5th baby, I am absolutely dreading them!

I'm now wondering about having a third so may start a thread about third births at some point...I hear they're a whole other kettle of fish...

A senior midwife I knew with 30 years experience told me 2nds are largely easier but thirds can go either way and are often then hardest of the three. My 2nd was definitely easier. I have no interest in a third!

A senior midwife I knew with 30 years experience told me 2nds are largely easier but thirds can go either way and are often then hardest of the three

I've heard the same...

Mine was. In fact my second birth was a dream and one of the very best experiences of my life- the pain never became overwhelming, I never felt that fear or loss of control, the second stage was just 4 minutes and honestly within a couple of days I didn't feel like I'd just had a baby at all. It was a homebirth with really good midwives who mostly just let me get on with it, I think the freedom to do as I pleased with the knowledge there was support if needed was key. (And my third was indeed the wildcard my midwife had said they often were!)