Mean approach to gift giving?

[CadburyFestiveFriends]

This year has been unusually busy.
Several big life events have happened.
We now have a baby due and are moving house in the new year. I made an effort, despite being quite unwell and on a budget, to get nice family gifts.

My grandparent has decided since there’s ‘so much going on’ they’ll ignore my graduation, mine and DH’s birthdays (both next month), Christmas and the birth of baby in favour of ‘getting us something nice’ for the new house at Easter.

I feel really put out and a bit hurt. I’m the youngest of 4 GC and all had their life milestones celebrated by GP. I’m substantially younger so by the time I get there it’s like they CBA!

Grandparent always seems to over complicate gifts for me, never forthcoming or easy (same thing happened for my wedding). They’re now making the usual effort for other grandkids/ great grandkids and just ignoring DH and I until Easter, months after the events! I’ll also be expected to ‘remind’ them. Which I won’t because it feels like asking for money and I hate that! (They are very well off).

My parents have a strained relationship as feel they’ve been emotionally manipulative in the past but this has never extended to me. This year has just felt odd and a bit mean.

AIBU to think DH and I shouldn’t have so much ignored and that gift giving should be done easily and at least around the correct times?

@kemosabeimalive

I doubt it as they told me to pick an item for the house. Something ‘nice’. No guidelines or budget suggested though 👍🏻

They're doing you a huge favour by not buying you Christmas gifts, because now you don't have to give them anything, freeing up the money to buy exactly what you want as your own little treat, instead of everybody spending money to end up with something that they don't want.

blog.moneysavingexpert.com/2009/11/is-it-time-to-ban-christmas-presents/?_ga=2.120943112.1650987431.1576835229-1372655992.1538652833

thats just shitting of them.

A graduation card costs under £1 and and a baby blanket or teddy etc... can be got for £2. Gifts for other events cost as much or as little as the giver likes so they should just adjust the budgets. Its the lack of effort and care that bothers me.

My issue with things like this is that its not the money that counts and just the thought but the EFFORT that counts, we can all think nice things but to put in effort to show you care and make those nice things happen is what really counts. If you remove all effort then your not actually putting any thought or care in.

*shitty not shitting lol

@BarbaraofSeville

Yes but they only announced they’re be ignoring us after we had already given them their gift (Which I had put time and energy into!)