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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be upset about no recognition from line manager ?

16 replies

Namechangenancyx · 18/12/2019 19:49

So my line manager (she is the SENCO and i'm a TA- we work in a high school) doesn't seem to like me.
She has accused me of lying twice even though there has never been any proof of me lying about anything before, and nobody else has ever accused me of lying.

When I had a job interview she said I was being really unfair on the kids (for leaving at Christmas) and implied I was selfish, which I found very unprofessional. I reported this but nothing was done.

Then when I did hand in my notice, she didnt acknowledge it in any shape or form. Not even 'ok'. Not a word. Just blanked it and then spoke to me coldly when she next saw me.

That I know of, I have never done anything to offend her, I am never late, hardly any sick days, i'm not terrible at my job and I cannot see what her issue is. She's also shouted at me in front of another colleague.

Then the next minute she can be friendly and says she really appreciates my work.

She's also treated another colleague like this.

Last month, a colleague left after 5 years, and was presented with a card and gift, and a small gathering to say goodbye, all organised by the manager, who had sent out a whole-school email to ask people to come sign her card.

I've finished after 1.5 years and I have received absolutely nothing. I asked 2 colleagues if she had sent out an email about me leaving and they said no, nothing.

I find it quite rude to do that for one colleague and not another. Of course, it's not surprising at the same time.

Why do people do that ? It's quite hurtful, do you think it's fair to only gift certain members of your team ? I hope my next manager will be kinder.

OP posts:
Namechangenancyx · 18/12/2019 21:49

Just bumping this :)

OP posts:
Instagrump · 18/12/2019 22:19

She's a pathetic cow. You just be glad you're done with her now.

Good luck in your new role.

ladybirdsarelovely33 · 18/12/2019 22:22

She is immature and not a good manager. Good thing you are leaving.

Waveysnail · 18/12/2019 22:29

Some people are bad managers. But a year and half in school time is virtually nothing

Rachelfromfriends1 · 18/12/2019 22:32

She sounds rude and cold towards you, but try your best not to dwell on her actions as it will only make you feel worse - you’re leaving soon so won’t have to work with her again!

BodenGate · 18/12/2019 22:36

Don’t give her another thought. She’s not worth it. Focus on the Christmas break and your new job. Never look back!

SandAndSea · 18/12/2019 22:50

Sadly, some people are arseholes.

Be glad you're moving on and don't have to be around her any more.

Namechangenancyx · 19/12/2019 09:06

Thank you. Just remembered that she also gave a leaving gift and card to someone who had been here for 9 months so even less. But yeah, at least I won't ever have to deal with her again. We have an older colleague with a chronic illness and the manager told her "think of all those children you are letting down" because this colleague went home ill and could barely move, and then marked her down as a full day absent even though she had gone home after lunch.

OP posts:
Brefugee · 19/12/2019 09:36

just be pleased you're out of there (congrats on the new job) because she's one of those who will play the "oh but we all need you, you're indespensible" when she wants something but as soon as you're leaving "you're meaningless and replaceable"

ManCubsMama · 19/12/2019 10:06

It’s a reflection on her, not you. Congratulations and good luck on the new job

OwlBeThere · 19/12/2019 10:16

I had a manager like this who absolutely tore strips off me for daring to apply for another job. I’d been there 6 years and I’d had exactly 3 days off in that time because I had an infection in my mouth so bad from a botched wisdom tooth extraction I couldn’t actually see as my face was like a pumpkin and I was in hospital. Which again she had made me feel guilty for and accused me of exaggerating. She was a horrible cow and I was so glad to be out of there I took a pay cut AND a longer commute. But I’m so much happier for it.

Zaphodsotherhead · 19/12/2019 10:19

I'd been in my job in a school for TWELVE YEARS and got nothing when I left (although my department were very sweet). Maybe it's because I left at short notice (only because the HT told me not to bother coming back once I'd handed my notice in). Yeah, that was a great place to work...

BrickTop999 · 19/12/2019 10:20

She sounds vile
Be glad youve left and cast her from your thoughts - she isnt worth any more of your time
Good luck with your new job !

ShirleyPhallus · 19/12/2019 10:34

It would be interesting to hear her side of your relationship

I wouldn’t give it any more thought though, you’ve left now, you didn’t get on, put it out of your mind and move forward

Misscromwellrocks · 19/12/2019 10:38

Unfortunately across the span of your working years you will usually come across at least one manager like this. They are usually unhappy or unfulfilled people taking their issues out on their staff.

The best thing is to escape from them as soon as possible. A few weeks in a new job will put her behaviour in perspective and you can just move on from it all..

Kaykay066 · 19/12/2019 10:40

We don’t get recognition from our boss, maybe more now one of the band 6 has stepped up and she’s fabulous and very appreciative of us.

But the manager is awful but we just do our jobs as best we can and get on with it, sad for you she’s like that perhaps jealous of you or she’s just a bit pf a bitch. Not professional behaviour at all.
Good luck in your new job op

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