Friend being strung along?
Jadefeather7 · 18/12/2019 13:18
One of my closest friends has been with her boyfriend for about 9/10 years now. They come from a culture/religion where marriage is very important and long term relationships where people don’t get married are pretty much unheard off. Her boyfriend knows that she really wants to get married and her family put her under quite a bit of pressure to settle down. They are approaching their mid 30s and I know she would like to have children (which without marriage is not a possibility for them). He usually has excuses for why they aren’t yet married eg sometimes it’s to do with the state of their relationship (she says not being married causes resentment, tension and fights) and at other times he will say that they will get married next year and when that times comes he says that he struggling with work/money so it’s not the right time. I’ve been hearing this for about 5 years. My friend is convinced that they are totally in love and she believes whatever he says. I can see though that it makes her really miserable. Any time that I try to subtly suggest that maybe it’s time to move on she seems determined to convince me that he’s totally in love and committed to her. This is the love of her life, so I can see why she’s so keen to cling on to this. Am I being too skeptical? Should I let her carry on hoping? Do I try to convince her that this isn’t going anywhere? I’ve been there for her for the past few years and I’m always around to listen. I just feel bad as she’s been depressed about this situation for so long and nothing ever changes.
Am I being unreasonable?AIBU
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