To be pissed at MIL

[Birdyfly]

Our household has finally recovered from a terrible cold (we had over two weeks of it!) And MIL comes round coughing a spluttering everywhere. Coughs in my dds face, and then coughs into her hands and touches my 8 month olds face. Wtf?! She then grabs my dds face again and attempts to dig food out of her mouth with her dirty fingers because "she has too much in her mouth" (when she didn't). The poor kid looked terrified and I promptly told her to leave her.
Funnily enough, days later I am now feeling unwell and I'm absolutely gutted. We had horrific flu for our Christmas day last year and I was so wanting a nice time this year. AIBU to be a bit pissed that she thinks it's ok to come round when she's clearly not well?! Why would anyone even do that, especially with very young children here?!

@birdyfly pissed! She’d be bloody banned from coming near my house without a boiler suit and mask on in future. With a strict no touching rule.

Putting her fingers in your poor child’s mouth after that is just grim!

Urgh. It's also dangerous to put your fingers in a child's mouth to remove food, that can cause choking.

Ugh Jesus don’t let her in again

@HanginWithMyGnomies I'm so tempted to ban her right now!

@KM99 Exactly what I said to her. She obviously knows best. I felt awful for DD. She just wanted to eat her dinner and MIL always has to get involved. I wish she would just leave her alone.

@Queenoftheashes Oh i won't be. DH is so oblivious sometimes and I wish he would speak up. My anxiety goes through the roof when MIL comes round.

I know I sound like I'm overreacting but I honestly could cry. I really was so desperate to just chill out over Christmas and enjoy my 8 month olds first Christmas.

I don’t think you’re overreacting being ill is shit and she made no effort to keep her germs to herself!

My Mil- I'd see it as interfering and thoughtless and trying to sabotage my Christmas. I'd be livid and seething.
My Mum- I'd see it as thoughtless -thoughtless- yes, but ultimately I'd see the loving side of wanting to see her dgc and would be mildly annoyed but forgiving. She just doesn't think sometimes

She obviously knows best. I felt awful for DD. She just wanted to eat her dinner and MIL always has to get involved. I wish she would just leave her alone.

So place her away from your mil. Do you sit at a table to feed her? Stick her out of reach. If it’s the high chair and you just plonk it anywhere, block her with your body. Physically block her, hand in the way, from stitcher hand in the baby’s mouth, that’s horrible.

If you all come down with a shitty cold, tell her! Tell her you’re fuming.

@Cherrysoup I sit her away from MIL but she just can't help herself and has to get involved. I've told her numerous times to leave DD. I'm planning on telling her - I'm so pissed that she thinks it's ok. I'm absolutely gutted as if planned to have family round and have bought a lot if food which will go to waste now if I'm not well.

I would intercept her if she tries to interfere with you baby. As she goes to her when she's eating say 'No. leave her alone, she is fine' and if she persists say 'You would'nt lie it if someone stuck their dirty fingers in your mouth when you are eating. DD doesn't like it either'
I would also ask her not to come round whne she has a cold becase you have all just got over one and don't want another. Most people don;t need to be told, they have the common sense to keep thier colds to themselves unless it is unavoidable.

You’re going to need to more assertive, OP. The only person defending your child is you. Don’t let her go round you or do something you don’t want her to do, your baby relies on you to keep her safe.

If it's a cold then you'll probably be feeling okay again by Christmas - It's a week away

Fingers crossed you won't get it

Digging food out of her mouth is just really weird.