to be a bit irked at DH's tendency to do all the fun stuff and neglect the fact there;s no bread or milk in the house?

[hatwoman]

and a load of washing and a load of washing up. he's taken dds out all morning while I've been at work. he didn;t even load the dishwashwer before they went out. he gets back at 2 pm 5 mins before he needs to go out "they haven;t had lunch and there's no bread or milk....byyeee"

Hi hatwoman YANBU this would drive me mad too. He sounds barely housetrained, good luck in a reprogramming campaign

YANBU - men's brains work in a totally different way to womens.

YANBU - I still can't understand how mine can hold down a fairly decent job which involves PLANNING, PRIORITISING etc etc but when looking after ds1&2, he only thinks about what to give them for tea when it is actually teatime and they're both screaming and holding onto his legs with hunger....

agree with devonsmummy

Men's brains are definatley different - Ignore the washing and the washing up it will still be there for him when he comes home. Buy the bread and milk and get some chocolate for yourself too!!

the thing is he is a very involved dad - arguably more than me (I care about my work; his is a means to an end) he certainly cooks more than me. and left to his own devices he would be fine. it's more to do with doing things differently. I come home from a morning's work and hate to see a pile of washing up on top of the dishwasher - he'll just shrug and say he was going to do it later. I really hate hate leaving the house without at least doing something. and really he could have come home earlier and popped in somewhere to get some food - again he'll just say he was going to do it later. so it's not really to do with laziness, nor with nor "seeing" the work, it's to do with organising him self differently - makes it very hard for me to change him....

Well at least you understand what's going on.
My dh always says if there is something I would like doing to leave him a list. If I leave a list it does get done. If I don't then he does it in his own time which could be a lot later than I would be able to leave it till, myself.