AIBU to think that Christmas should be a four-yearly event?

[PineappleDanish]

A bit like the Olympics, or the World Cup.

For the overwhelming majority of people it's not a religious celebration. And of course if Christmas is about religion for you, you can still go to church. But AIBU to think the whole thing would be better if it was once every four years rather than annually, starting the first week in September?

Total ban on decorations, present buying, consumption and spending for the sake of it, no elves, no christmas jumper days, no cheesy music, no pantomimes, no trees, no stress, no works nights out, just none of it.

Would be amazing.

How do you mean? I guess people need to just be stricter about who they buy for. I notice a lot of people buy for all their mates and their mates kids. Work colleagues neighbours acquantances. Madness. I just buy for my family and dp and tell everyone else im not doing presents.

I think a lot of it comes down to the fact that isn’t not really Christmas that is the problem for a lot of people; it’s that their DH/friends/family/colleagues are shit. If you have family that are argumentative about visits, a DH that doesn’t lift a finger, colleagues that hassle you about coming to the Party; then that’s because they’re shit people, not because of Christmas. The likelihood is that they’re crap all year round, it’s just Christmas is when it all comes together.

The solution is to not surround yourself with crap selfish people, not to ban Christmas!

I love Christmas. I grew up in an abusive household so I had none as a child. But I only do what I want to do so it doesn't become a chore. We don't go here there and everywhere, we stay at home and are happy to host or not as people wish.

I think sometimes the idea of Christmas as a family time puts a lot of pressure on people. Sometimes it is about putting in boundaries. For example, as a child I was dragged from house to house which made it stressful and exhausting, so i won't do that now. We do have a nice dinner, but just an upgraded roast without starters. We will go to parties etc but always have one day off at the weekend and we get all of our presents on Black Friday as I hate trailing round boiling shops in December.

I think people take too much on and fall into the trap of having to have the best Christmas ever and then end up hating the whole thing as it is expensive and stressful. Just scale the whole thing back and be a little more selfish in some ways. I also refuse to see difficult horrible relatives who can just have the rest of the year to ruin everything.

I am pagan so I focus more on Yule anyway.

Oh and my DH does his fair share too or I wouldn't be with him

I get what you mean. I'm 23 and time goes so quickly, feels like no time at all before it's Christmas again! But Xmas being once every few years is what my nan used to say... Turning into her

Im baffled anyone finds christmas stressful tbh but then, i write a list of who i need to buy gifts for and buy them in the jan sales and wrap them as soon as im home and keep them in the wardrobe. One huge job done for the year.

Each to their own and all that but I would find this quite joyless. It wouldn't work for my kids and their ever changing interests anyway.

Or you could do 25% of Christmas every year

I like Christmas, but for me it is a religious celebration. However just like with Easter it is balanced with a season of reflection (advent and lent). I also love the decorations and for us community spirit. I do agree it starts way too early in shops/online.

You can cut back, but I think it is important for some people that are lonely. Although in theory we should look out for people at any time of year having Christmas makes it more likely they get human contact such as cards.

I love the way that people on MN think that the world should revolve around what they want. By all means celebrate Christmas every 4, 10, 50 years but don't try and inflict it on others.

I don't get all the angst around Christmas either; I just do the parts I like. TBH I hadn't heard of most of these things till reading about them on MN anyway (elf on a shelf etc.) so I ignore all that. Probably helps that me and DP don't have kids though and we don't go anywhere, we visit family before/after. I send a few gifts and a very few cards and I buy most of the dinner ready done from M&S so no real stress. I actually quite like writing cards and decorating the tree, those are the simple pleasurable parts for me. I think YABU as no-one is making you do it; I hate mindless consumerism as well but I just avoid the shops, you don't have to do stuff just cos other people are. I don't do anything before December.

Also I'm not bothered about presents; adult presents are pointless IMO; just do something nice together instead. DC are different but then again when I read about what people spend on their DC on here it seems it has escalated a lot since I was a kid so you might have a point there.

wow that would be brilliant. christmas is so overdone, i hate it. we spend basically a quarter of the year in xmas mode there is nothing special about it.

Like it or lump it Christmas is a Religious event , and has nothing to do with over spending , over eating or over anything tbh

There is nothing to stop you having some sort of celebration every 4 years instead

Yabu, my family all love Christmas so if you hate it that much just tell your family you’re not doing it anymore , that’ll go down well I’m sure

The charity I volunteer for told managers that Christmas cards should start to be displayed from August bank holiday weekend. We have had an increasing amount of Christmas stock since. Given the amount that's still left with a week to go, we'll still have it hanging around for most of January too until they call it quits and we're asked to package it up and send it back.

So August, September, October, November, December AND January - six fecking months of the year.

I cannot imagine being so obsessed with Christmas that you're out shopping and wrapping in January for the next year. Sheer hell.

That’s your problem. Christmas should not be starting in August.

All those people Who love Christmas - what's your secret? Lots of money, helpful family? Why isn't it added stress for you?

We're not well off, but I start early buying for my DC and don't overdo it. We do a family secret santa, and then a couple of boxes of chocolates for elderly relatives.

Christmas Eve box, same contents each year, just bigger PJs.

I don't do cards. One father Christmas visit. We are at church a lot so there's lots of Carol services, nativity stuff and Jesus prep, but that's fairly contained.

I don't do the actual cooking, that's my DF, but we do a list and then go shopping together and do the prep as a team. DM is the vicar, so pretty much unavailable for most of December.

(I am a SAHM to one 3yo so I do have it easy with regards to time constraints and am very fortunate in that regard.)

Why do people have to ruin everything for others?

You're miserable but thats on you, if you dont like something or it doesn't apply to you then just dont celebrate it but why ruin it for those who do partake?

A fair example is I dont celebrate Hanuka but I cant even imagine being upset or telling those that do that they shouldn't because I don't.

Ok Cromwell

I don't understand the 'convenience' of buying xmas presents in January. Surely that's just buying random stuff rather than something that is specific to the gift receiver. One present I have bought this year is the latest Wimpy Kid book (£6 from the supermarket). That didn't exist in January. It hadn't been published. I really can't see how January bought presents can be very good presents.

Every year seems much longer when you’re a child!

Talk about pulling up the ladder “. We had it annually when we were kids!

I don't understand the 'convenience' of buying xmas presents in January. Surely that's just buying random stuff rather than something that is specific to the gift receiver.

Exactly. How do you know that someone isn't going to buy the item themselves during the year, be given it by someone else or just go off it? Or that you might get a better idea for them nearer the time?

I’d just be happy if the whole thing didn’t start cropping up everywhere until Dec 1st.

I dont buy presents early and i dont find Christmas stressful. Its as stressful as you want to make it

I love Christmas even though I've had some really sad ones (first Christmasses without my parents) and ones that I just ended up exhausted by.
Now I buy presents for about 12 people including DP and DS - DP and I don't buy huge presents each as we usually book a holiday and put our money towards that.
Don't do Elf/North Pole Breakfast/Xmas Eve boxes as they're an expensive waste of time.
I love the run up to Xmas, meeting up with friends, lunches and drinks out and the seeing the lovely decorations everywhere.
Xmas day itself we have a nice dinner, drinks and family movie we can all doze in front of - also board games/walks and some family visits.