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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Have I started a parking war?

31 replies

temmy99 · 15/12/2019 23:28

AIBU - To feel I have started a Parking war!

We have a parking bay for 2 cars (lined by the council as one long parking space but can fit 1 small and 1 large car) in between our house and neighbour. We both have driveways as well as the parking bay in front. The problem is my NDN has 3 big cars and always park 1 of their cars in the middle of the parking bay when they take the other cars out. When they come back in the evening, they will move the car further up in front of our house and park another car behind so basically hogging both spaces for their car while leaving the front of their driveway free to drive in and out. Us on the other hand have 2 cars in our household so while 1 car is in the driveway, we park the other car across the driveway but this is not always possible depending on how they park, we can't fit the car without blocking NDN on other side. I have asked them politely to give us a bit of space to park car in front to no avail. Last week, I dropped a note asking them again if they can allow us to share the parking bay by parking a car each but they still parked in the middle. A few days ago, ( I admit I was angry), I parked my dd's car at their end of the parking bay and left it for 3 days while we parked the other 2 cars at ease. But just yesterday, as ds went to move dd's car, they came out of their house and started shouting at him. I have now moved the car and they have parked in the middle of the bay again. AIBU to feel so upset about this. I hate confrontations.

Have I started a parking war?
OP posts:
LionelRitchieStoleMyNotebook · 15/12/2019 23:31

Unless you have two very small cars I don't see how they'd both fit within the box with no overhang. Is the bay for anyone's use or does it belong to a property?

Original poster
temmy99 · 15/12/2019 23:52

It is a public parking bay and both cars overhang on each side but as it is in front of our driveways, it has never been a problem, with our previous neighbours at least.

OP posts:
DingDongDenny · 15/12/2019 23:56

What were they shouting at you? Surely you are doing the same thing they do

YouRemindMeOfTheBabelfish · 15/12/2019 23:58

I can see what you mean. Your neighbour is being unreasonable.

HamsterHolder · 15/12/2019 23:59

Sounds like a parking problem certainly! If I wasn't to precious about my car I'd be tempted to park on their drive, no law against that either. Also if they do damage your car its just escalating to the level where theirs gets damaged too.

Is it possible to have a bit more of discussion with them and see if it could be de escalated before it gets out of hand or resentment grows to the point its difficult to wind back?

BlackCatSleeping · 16/12/2019 00:00

I don’t know. It’s a parking bay. They are parking in the parking bay. I don’t think they are doing anything wrong. 🤷‍♀️

Original poster
temmy99 · 16/12/2019 00:08

@DingDongDenny they didn't shout at me, they shouted at my son when he went to move the car but as you mentioned, I just parked in front of their house, within the bay like they have been doing.

OP posts:
Original poster
temmy99 · 16/12/2019 00:11

@hamsterHolder after my son being shouted at, I'm not sure how to approach them as it is clear that they want to continue parking both of their cars in front

OP posts:
MyKingdomForBrie · 16/12/2019 00:14

I'd say there's nothing you can do except park there when it's available and not when it's not. You can't reason with people like this, they're selfish and that's they way they will stay.

@BlackCatSleeping that's a sad way to look at the world. They're using their car to 'bagsie' both spaces even when they don't need both in order to prevent OP from using it at any time - they could easily park at their end so she can have hers when they only have one car home.

coldlighthappier · 16/12/2019 00:16

They’re allowed to park exactly where they’re parking so I think you’ve been unreasonable with that. They never should’ve shouted at your son though so for that they’re being unreasonable

Original poster
temmy99 · 16/12/2019 00:18

@blackcatsleeping I am not saying they are doing anything wrong just that as we both have more than 1 car we should be able to share the bay. When there are no cars (odd occasions) in the bay, i always park my car with the back tyres on the line leaving enough space for them to park in front but when it's the other way round they will either park in the middle or just on the line in front of our house so we won't be able to park behind them.

OP posts:
Roundtoedshoes · 16/12/2019 00:18

They are inconsiderate arseholes who will never change I’m afraid. Whilst it’s true they are free to park like that, decent neighbours (and human beings in general), wouldn’t.

BlackCatSleeping · 16/12/2019 00:23

In a fair world, then, yes, you should both share the space equally. However, it’s not a fair world. It’s a first come, first served world, so I don’t see what you can do about it really. If the space is free, park in it. They have no right to shout at you for it. It’s a public space. No one has ownership over it.

GemmaGemmaGemma · 16/12/2019 00:29

No one has been UR here apart from them shouting at your DS, parking-wise you're both entitled to do exactly as you have/are. Yes it would be nice if they shared the space fairly but you can't make them so the best advice I can give you is stop letting it wind you up. Park there when it's free, don't when it's not and refuse to get annoyed about when or where they're parking. Letting it make you angry only hurts you and gets you nowhere because you still can't make them do anything Flowers

TrixieFranklin · 16/12/2019 00:32

They're wankers

katewhinesalot · 16/12/2019 00:36

Hog the space whenever you can.

Tellem87 · 16/12/2019 00:43

What did they say to your son? Why did they think they have the right to take the whole space?

Sounds very odd. As long as you keep parking and leaving them the other half I don't think they can complain. I don't think you'll change their behaviour if you've already asked and they haven't though!

Bowerbird5 · 16/12/2019 00:45

You could always try the council.

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 16/12/2019 00:57

They are selfish fuckers who have clearly decided that you have no rights to the parking bay and give absolutely no fucks about your or yours.

There is, unfortunately, very little you can do about it - but I'd park like they do every given opportunity and refuse to move the car EVER until you actually want to.

PaulHollywoodsleftbollockhair · 16/12/2019 01:02

Hire a skip for when you know they will be out and leave it there for ages... with only enough room for a little car if possible Grin

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 16/12/2019 01:03

Oh I like that idea, what a great move! Grin

DorothyParkersCat · 16/12/2019 01:06

i always park my car with the back tyres on the line

Not the main issue here but I think you have a misunderstanding of parking law here. I have friends who have got tickets for car overhang.
Where there are parking markings the whole car has to be within the lawful parking zone. So if there is a single line hours controlled abutting a double yellow line, if you park with car overhang (wheels on the join) you are unlawfully parked because part of your car is within the double yellow line zone.

This may matter here because you may as well just park your one care in the middle as the bay cannot lawfully take two cars if the surrounding zones are parking controlled.

Chocmallows · 16/12/2019 01:07

Park on the road as close to their car as you can so they cannot move forward to let the other car in.

BlackCatSleeping · 16/12/2019 01:12

Yes, just park in the middle of the bay. The bay is only designed for one car. No one should be parking overhanging the bay.

Original poster
temmy99 · 16/12/2019 07:56

Thank you everyone for your responses

@tellem87 they came out and said something like '
Should we park in front of your driveway too' and went back in slamming their door

@GemmaGemmaGemma thank you for the advice that is what I have been doing parking when it's free which is hardly because there is always at least 1 car at home

@ThumbWitchesAbroad I intend to when I can summon the courage

@PaulHollywoodsleftbollockhair GrinGrin very tempting!

@DorothyParkersCat there are no lines or parking controls on my street having been here for over 15 years the number of people opening their driveways have meant less parking bays.on the road. The previous neighbours had 2 cars and 1 was always permanently parked on the edge of the parking bay in front of their house, we also did the same. These new neighbours moved in a couple of years ago and they initially kept parking right at 5he edge of the parking bay in front of our house. This left enough space for me to park my smal vauxhall Corsa behind theirs but I don't think they liked that and that is when they started parking in the middle of 5he parking bay Angry

OP posts:
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