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AIBU?

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Original poster

To dance how I want?!

14 replies

jakeyboy1 · 15/12/2019 10:37

Went to a party last night. Unusually DH drove so I was having a drink. Not pissed just a couple. A favourite song of mine came on so hit the dance floor. Literally side stepping nothing too extreme. In the space of five minutes DH taps me twice to tell me to be careful and not bump into people. This has happened before. Everyone there is pretty drunk and bashing into each other all over the place I doubt they would care if I did bump them.DH is known for taking over an entire dance floor and not really caring who is in his way when he's had a drink.

Anyway, this just gave me the rage. I find it so frigging patronising. Got me so cross we had a row and then left. I was just having a little dance to a song I love and was not doing anyone any harm. I do not need to be tapped on at every two mins to be told to be careful in case I bump someone. He has done this before and it drives me insane. I think because he is sober he sees me dancing and thinks I am going to embarrass him. He claims he is doing it to look after me so I don't hurt myself. I am not going to hurt myself I wish my dancing was that energetic but it really isn't.

I am fed up of people making petty criticisms at me and have had a number this week so it probably tipped me over the edge. Top one this week from my boss "you look very smart but take that hair band off your wrist" ITS FOR MY HAIR LATER! Also being told I hadn't done my daughters hair straight enough and her bunches were slightly lopsided was another - I know she's 4 and won't stand still for 2 minutes she's going to gymnastics who really cares?

Why do people feel the need to pick constantly?

Am I being hypersensitive?

Am I wrong to still be cross with DH? As far as I'm concerned I was having a nice time and he ruined it. I don't get to go out much and was genuinely having a nice time. Why do it. Just why?

OP posts:
LuluBellaBlue · 15/12/2019 10:50

He’s massively projecting his insecurities onto you. And your boss just seems to mirror him as I would t stand for that comment either.
Maybe build up some stock responses, other mumsnetters will have some like:
Do you mean to be so rude?
Please go away and leave me alone
Are you feeling ok as that’s an odd thing to say?

Original poster
jakeyboy1 · 15/12/2019 10:58

I hadn't thought about it like that. I know it all sounds petty and minor I am just sick of people feeling the need to dig.

OP posts:
LyingWitchlnTheWardrobe · 15/12/2019 11:02

Oh that's annoying. He didn't do it to protect you from your oh-so-vigorous dancing and there's no good reason why he did it at all.

Adding to Lulu's suggestions - "I'm quite capable of managing not to bump into people, how very odd you are sometimes. Tiresome too. You're embarrassing yourself as well as me".

Put up a hand in front of his face and walk away every time he denigrates you and tries to manage you.

Idratherbeonquora · 15/12/2019 11:57

Ha! Id be turning up to work with 15 hairbands on my wrist on monday.
Im surprised youre posting about that as an add on. I think that would have upset me more than the dancing comment.

And who said your dds hair was lop sided? I hate to imagine what someone would say to me! Sometimes if my dd wont sit still her hair looks a mess!

I dont dance though, so thats why the others got to me!

GertrudeCB · 15/12/2019 12:26

He was negging to make you feel self conscious. What a prat Angry

AnyFucker · 15/12/2019 12:33

I wouldn't have gone home and cut my evening short

You should have have carried on dancing and told him to go boil his head

BackforGood · 15/12/2019 12:40

I'd have told him not to be ridiculous and bust out a few Saturday Night Fever moves.
What a really bizarre thing to say.

Savingshoes · 15/12/2019 13:04

go boil his head... Grin that's the best response!! Lol

chamenanged · 15/12/2019 13:14

No I'd still be pissed off too. How fucking irritating of him.

WaggleWiggle · 15/12/2019 13:25

All the things you’ve mentioned people saying to you are reasons to be irritated with them so YANBU.

Original poster
jakeyboy1 · 15/12/2019 13:39

Go boil his head Grin

Thanks. Glad it's not me being paranoid.

OP posts:
Original poster
jakeyboy1 · 15/12/2019 13:40

The hair comment was from another school mum.

OP posts:
RandomMess · 15/12/2019 13:43

I work with someone who makes all those sort of little comments, it is absolutely exhausting ignoring the critical shit that pours out from her...

LaurieSchafferIsAllBitterNow · 15/12/2019 13:55

tell him to bugger off, you sound too nice and people know they can boss you about.

or he can come live me me...I'd embarrass him to death...I cannot even remember where I was this week but for some reason they had a Beegees selection going on...I did the whole John Travolta hips and pointing to make dh laugh, he did the Travolta Strut!

then an assistant came out with a whole trolley load of stuff and laughed themselves silly at us.

oooh Home Bargains! they are fun and no shoulder tapping in there!

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