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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Got drunk before I realised I was pregnant and feel horrifically guilty :(

18 replies

AuntVictoria · 13/12/2019 23:41

I've just found out I am 4 weeks pregnant (period was due today). DH and I aren't using contraception but we haven't been properly TTCing, and conceiving DS took quite a lot of effort with ovulation sticks, tracking etc. We were going to TTC properly in the New Year.

I went out for a few drinks with some friends on Wednesday and ended up drinking far too much and getting in at 2am. I rarely go to the pub now and never drink that much so I just got carried away.

I feel awful Sad I'm so worried in case I have caused FAS in my baby. I've been so selfish drinking when there was a chance I could be pregnant, I know that. Can anyone reassure me?

OP posts:
Onceuponatimethen · 13/12/2019 23:43

Yes please try not to worry

Onceuponatimethen · 13/12/2019 23:44

At 4 weeks pregnant (ie 2 weeks since you conceived), the baby is tiny and as far as I’m aware no umbilical cord connected to a placenta, so developing from the egg nutrition wise.

MooseBeTimeForSummer · 13/12/2019 23:45

Please don’t worry. I didn’t find out I was pregnant until I was 17 weeks. In that time I had a leaving party, left the UK and celebrated arriving in Canada several times. Each time I probably drank a little bit too much.

youmaynowchangeyourname · 13/12/2019 23:45

I did similar. Had no clue I was pregnant and had a big night out. There were shots. I have a beautiful bright intelligent daughter. I know many friends who did the same.

Onceuponatimethen · 13/12/2019 23:47

So many people do this before they know and my dm certainly accidentally drank at this stage. I would think it is by far the most likely outcome that all will beok

BingoLittlesUncle · 13/12/2019 23:49

You and probably 90% of pregnant women. The chances of any damage being done are minuscule I would say.

HamAndPineapple · 13/12/2019 23:51

God half the world did that! I did. My perfectly healthy daughter is very clever and beautiful.

ToriaPumpkin · 13/12/2019 23:51

I found out friends had conceived immediately when we were on our 9th month of TTC DC2. I drank two bottles of wine and after what I assumed was a really terrible week long hangover discovered I was pregnant. I was advised not to worry as at that point the placenta etc is not yet providing the baby with anything so the alcohol has no effect. I also read a lot of information about FAS as I once taught a child with it and you have to do a lot of drinking over an extended period of time to cause damage, though obviously it's advised to abstain. Try not to worry.

BlueEyedFloozy · 13/12/2019 23:52

FAS is not caused by a few sessions of binge drinking in the early days - it's caused by prolonged exposure to alcohol whilst the brain is forming later on.

The foetus is just a ball of cells right now forming around the egg, it is not yet getting anything from your body.

Most people (me included) have done this.

ContessaLovesTheSunshine · 13/12/2019 23:54

Ah, you'll be fine.

I carefully took a pregnancy test on my 30th birthday (safety first!) which came out negative. I went out and got plastered. 1 week later it turned out I was 3 weeks pregnant. DS2 is fine Grin

I also took all the drying-out drugs going in my first week of pregnancy with DS1 (not that I realised) as I had the worst cold I've ever had in my life. He is also fine!!

TheFormidableMrsC · 13/12/2019 23:54

I got very drunk one New Year’s Eve before I discovered I was pregnant. I then went to a party the following week and had quite a bit then. I was horrified when I found out. Midwife reassured me that it would be fine, baby in egg sac and not attached. I stressed so much. DD is now 21 and at uni doing her degree. Please try not to worry, this happens so often! Congratulations 💐

AuntVictoria · 14/12/2019 00:01

Thank you all, you're really helping to quell the rising panic! I'm driving my husband insane by Googling and panicking Grin

OP posts:
MummBraTheEverLeaking · 14/12/2019 00:05

Yep please don't worry. About 3 days before my positive test I went out, had a rare steak, shared a bottle of red wine, had espresso martinis and a couple of other cocktails I can't remember. DD is nearly 2 and absolutely fine!

wheretoyougonow · 14/12/2019 00:05

Step away from Google!

I did the same and went clubbing into the wee small hours not realising I was pregnant. Felt very guilty but 17 years later I can confirm it didn't affect him at all. Try and enjoy your pregnancy from now on and congratulations Thanks

PurpleFlower1983 · 14/12/2019 00:10

I went to a wedding in London with a free bar on the Saturday before I found out I was pregnant, I worried too but my DD is now a gorgeous, healthy 10 month old.

Congratulations!

Drum2018 · 14/12/2019 00:11

You and a lot of woman I know! I recall being out most nights over Christmas, drinking lots and then found out I was pregnant in early January - that was 19 years ago and that Ds is out drinking tonight while I'm home drinking tea Grin We had stopped ttc for the Christmas season as I wanted to have fun. So we did have fun but obvioulsy forgot to be careful on one occasion - at least I could pinpoint the night he was conceived Grin FAS won't be caused by one bender so don't worry. Relax and enjoy the pregnancy.

OpportunityKnocks · 14/12/2019 00:16

I was hungover when i found out I was pregnant with dc1.
I was out drinking with a friend when she said she had a feeling i was pregnant. I was.

Both are healthy children. Try not to worry, you'll have many many years of worrying to come yet :)

Monkeynuts18 · 14/12/2019 08:23

Please please please try not to worry. As others have said, the placenta hasn’t formed yet. FAS results from prolonged exposure at a later stage of your pregnancy.

Also, so so many women do this (me included). I was so anxious about it, just like you are. I mentioned it to the midwife and she smiled and said ‘if I had a pound for every mum who comes in worried about drinking before they realised they were pregnant, I’d be seriously rich.’

Anecdotes probably won’t reassure you but I flew business class to a conference with work. It was the first time I’d ever flown business class. So my colleague and I arrived at the lounge a good two hours early to take advantage of the free bar. Then we got through a couple of bottles of champagne on board. We arrived at our destination absolutely plastered. The next day my period didn’t arrive. A couple of days later I took a test and it was positive! I have have a bouncing 98th centile 4.5 month old.

I couldn’t relate to your anxiety more but again - please try not to worry!

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