18 mo DS and hitting

[InnisandGunn]

My DS has recently started a phase of hitting and pushing. I've seen him do it at nursery to other children at pick up. He doesn't try and push or hit his dad, or anyone else really, except me. I think I'm firm with him, but me and DP are really not the shouting types. After speaking to nursery about it, as it was concerning me, they suggested the naughty chair. Just for 45 seconds, put him on it and ignore him. Problem is he just gets up laughing, and by that point he's forgotten what he's done. They've also suggested removing him from a situation, getting down on his level and saying no, then comforting whoever he hit/pushed.

He's a happy, lovely little boy, but he's obviously picked up these behaviours, which I've been reassured are very normal, but I'm struggling because he's not at an age yet where his communication is good enough to explain etc.

Does anyone have any magical ways of stopping this in its tracks before it becomes more of an issue?

Not strictly AIBU, although AIBU to be so concerned by this?

Hes 18 months. I wouldnt really be that worried.

Tho id try to get him to stop doing it

As nursery said I would Get down to his level and tell him no very firmly, not shouting but to get the message across that he shouldn’t do it.

Has any other kid burst into tears in front of him? I've seen that cure confirmed pushers but they do sometimes move on to being persistent cuddlers.

There are giant toys you can get to push over, does nursery have one they can redirect him to?

Get down to his level tell him firmly, if it doesn't work try a fake cry. It is very normal at that age, it is an important time to teach them it is wrong, many people excuse toddlers hitting as they're toddlers.
They are smart little beings at 18 months and need to be taught No hitting.

At a year and a half, I would say he is a bit young for the naughty seat, they don't get ut at that age. A very firm no in a louder voice than usual, but not shouting and make sure you keep his attention and he is looking at you for a few seconds. Firmly say his name to get his attention, the a firm "no, do not do that". Complicate things with jibber jabber and they don't understand and lose interest.

Thanks everyone. I agree that he's too young for the naughty step, and it feels so futile because he moves off the chair. I feel he's too young to link his actions with a punishment as such. When he goes to hir me I more often than not hold his wrist (not harsh or strong at all, just to stop him from doing it again), look him in the eye and say no, we don't do that. I just don't understand why he doesn't do it to my Mum or his dad. He's with me for the majority of time so don't know if it's a feeling more comfortable thing. He recently did it to my parents dog and that got to me more than him hitting me. Yet he still didn't seem to get that it wasn't okay. Nursery have assured me that it's normal and there's 4/5 months that are tough because of communication but pushing boundaries. I don't know, I just feel like I'm fighting a losing battle.

He hasn't had other kids crying, but nursery have said he gets upset when they comfort the child he's hit/pushed. But obviously I can't do that when I'm on my own with him. Fake crying might be a good idea though!

Completely normal at 18 months. They have literally no impulse control so often lash out if frustrated. Not much you can do other than remove them from the situation and model how to resolve the situation calmly. At 18 months you have a long while before they get it though.