To feel trapped?
notjoking · 11/12/2019 21:52
OK, so it's not quite as dramatic as that. I'm happy with life but when I think of the future I just feel clueless. I've NC as some of the details could be outing.
I'm 18, DS is 18 months. Myself and DP (with DS) rent a cottage from my grandparents. We rent for a very reasonable price and don't take this blessing for granted.
Unfortunately, towards the end of this year we've noticed some serious problems that need addressing. There is terribly bad mould & damp throughout the house, particularly in the kitchen and our bedroom which makes me concerned for DS health. The kitchen is literally falling apart and there is a leak in our bedroom ceiling due to an unsafe attic. There are other things too, but I won't bore you. We need to find somewhere else to live whilst these problems are tackled, but I have no idea where we could go & we don't have any money.
We live quite rurally, which is not great in our position but we waited on the council housing list for months with no luck and then the cottage became available (4 weeks before DS due date) so it's where we've ended up. I work 2 part-time jobs and DP works too. He needs more hours but his employer doesn't give him many. He is actively searching for more work, but this is particularly tough in an area with so little opportunity. If he could drive, work would be easier to find but driving lessons are a luxury we can't afford right now. Universal Credit keeps us afloat but barely, and they don't make it easy. We both want to go back into education & get qualified, but we can't afford to do that.
I don't know where to start on our future. I don't want to be stuck in this cycle forever. I used to be so ambitious. I'm thinking about open-university. I've been so focused on DS and loving motherhood, that I think reality has only just hit me. I also don't know where we're going to live whilst the house gets sorted.
I don't even know what my AIBU is, I'm just tired and needed to vent. Sorry for a painfully long read of complaints.
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