To ask your advice regarding doctors appt?

[ShellsandSand]

I'm sorry to post in AIBU? But it was the topic of my last thread and the app is playing up and not allowing me to change it. Anyway, my 8 year old DD is displaying some women signs of Dyspraxia. I'm not one to self diagnose but Dyspraxia is something that caught my attention many years ago when on hearing the signs I could relate as to why I always felt so useless and like I didn't 'work properly' Anyway back to my Daughter. Since being a baby we have noticed things that have stuck out for us such as pointing with her middle finger, writing and drawing with both hands (albeit not very good so definitely not ambidextrous) poor foot and hand coordination when it comes to sports, dance, swimming, biking. Not being able to sit on a chair with her legs down and extremely poor posture. Her hand writing is appalling compared to her peers and her teacher is constantly pulling me on it. We have bought her all the cursive handwriting aids on Amazon with no improvement. We have a 4 year old DD who can do most things better than my 8 year old DD and I'm so worried that she will start to notice and feel useless or incapable. The thing is I know it's not through wsnt of trying. She tries soooooo hard and I push her hard but the outcome is always the same. Here's the thing. I would like to seek the advice of a GP and maybe find out if this is something like Dyspraxia so have made an appt for a couple of weeks time. The thing is I don't want her sat in the room with me whilst I list all these things we have noticed that she me feel are 'faults' and that her Mum is trash talking her. Especially if it turns out she hasnt got it and she's just gormless! How do I deal with this? Should I speak to the Doctor on my own and then bring her in after or explain to her beforehand. I'm really worried about the impact it could have on her self confidence. Has anyone been through anything similar? And I'm not a snowflake raising a snowflake I just think 8 is a funny age to hear a huge list of things your parents think you're doing wrong. TIA

Honestly, the Gp probably wouldn’t be overly interested and refer you to another service.l anyway. Perhaps a paediatrician, am occupational therapist, physiotherapist who can asses her in a proper manner.

I don't think it is lack of interest on GP's part; deciding which is most appropriate service and referring you on it is what GP is for.

deciding which is most appropriate service and referring you on it is what GP is for.

Exactly

We self referred to occupational therapy. Is that an option for you?

In the exact same situation I spoke to the receptionist in advance about my worries and what we decided was that I would write a letter which I would send in, in advance of the appointment. The receptionist would send the GP a message asking him to read the letter before we came in.

I sent the letter in, and took a copy of the letter with me just in case anything went wrong . . . just as well (read on).

We got there I said "I have put what I am worried about in a letter, I arranged with the receptionist that you would be asked to read it before we came in." Blank look. No one had told him, he hadn't read anything. But I had my copy so I gave him that, he read it discreetly, then tactfully carried on with the appointment. All was well.

So even with it all going wrong it was all OK! DS got referred to a motor skills clinic, he was not diagnosed with dyspraxia (possibly as I didn't push for it, as he has other medical issues and I didn't want any more "labels" for him) but he was diagnosed with it aged 17 when he needed to get a WP for doing exams and we needed a reason.

Your DD isn't gormless. From what you've said she clearly has difficulties in some areas and talents in others.

Getting a professional assessment is a great idea but, particularly at a young age, it might turn out that she doesn't necessarily tick the right boxes for a diagnosis. That doesn't mean she doesn't have genuine difficulties. Having a name for it doesn't make it any better or worse. She still needs support and help with those difficulties.

One of my DC was very similar and was assessed several times but when they were young their spiky profile didn't quite fit any of the diagnoses (it was only in their teens that the disparities became more obvious) which made getting support at school a lot harder. However, the OT/EP gave invaluable advice on how to help and support them, coping strategies etc. One of their concerns, even at just 6, was that DC was being held back, getting bored and frustrated because they could not reach their potential even though they were at the top of the class at school despite struggling to write so weren't getting any help. Some of things they suggested were exercises to help with fine motor skills, recording things like stories (to allow them to be creative without being confined by having to get it on the page), eventually moving on to using a laptop.