To not take Dd to the doctors..

[Foxton20]

Dd12 has been complaining of a sore shoulder for the past few days. She refuses to take paracetamol and demands I take her to the doctors.

She says she can’t carry her bag etc.

I say she’s putting it on to get a day off school and/or out of pe.

Aibu to not take her doctors?

I wouldn’t accuse her of lying BUT I do think you need to use a bit of common sense here. How bad is the pain? What kind of pain is it? Does she know what caused it?

Is the shoulder sore enough to warrant a visit to the doctors? If she’s just pulled a muscle then, no. Personally I’d keep an eye on it, and if it’s not getting any better then contemplate the doctors in a few days.

Does she have form for faking to get out of school / Pe?

If she's putting it on why would she want to go to the doctors and be found out? Is she using that arm as normal?

No she doesn’t tbh! She said it’s from the shoulder to her elbow. Doesn’t hurt to touch but to move.

It could be the strain from the heavy bags they have to carry? Do they have lockers? Make an after school appointment, I don’t see the issue with taking her to be honest.

I think she hopes the doctor says it’s true and says she doesn’t have to go school.

Why won’t she take calpol if it hurts?

Just take her. If there’s no problem, that’s ammunition for getting her to do PE.

Book her an appointment for after school

Right, this may sound a bit weird, but I get this when I wear an ill fitting bra! Could it be she needs one or a new one? It actually really hurts, but obviously I don't go to gps for it.

If she is putting it on to get out of school and she normally doesn't do that, I would wonder why that is. Is there a test in a subject she hates or is something else going on?

YABU take her to the doctors.
No child faking an injury wants to go to a doctor.

My mantra is if you take pain killers regular and are still in pain then I will take you to the doctors.

It's a weird conclusion for you to jump to when she has no form for trying to get out of school and an achey shoulder is highly unlikely to result in a day off anyway. As to why she won't have calpol, why does she say she doesn't want it? Would she put ice or heat on it instead?

Oh sorry! Not getting out of school, just PE. Why does she want out of PE?

It’s the not wanting to take painkillers that’s making me

I wouldn’t go to the Dr for a sore shoulder. I’d go to an osteopath.

What kind of bag does she have? An ill fitting one that she carries over that shoulder or a well fitting back pack.

Make the appointment. You'll be lucky to get one before Christmas anyway and then she'll be better in January and you can cancel it again.

I agree an osteopath or a sports massage might be better, but of course costs.

Is she using that arm at all, and if so does it look as if she's in pain?

Better to take her to be proved right then not take her and be proved wrong.

This happened with my son (10yo),complaining he was ill on the way to school one day, I called his bluff by taking him to the school doctor and he had low blood pressure and needed time off with plenty of fluids!