Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Miffed we weren't invited to work Xmas do.

144 replies

YouAreTheEggManIAmTheWalrus · 10/12/2019 08:54

So myself and another lady work PT self-employed for a large local firm. Regardless of being PT we have a role integral to the business and have probably saved them thousands of pounds in payouts due to complaints by taking preemptive/preventative measures. We also go over and above in the busy summer period, grafting our backsides off doing physical jobs that aren't in our remit to pick up the slack when other staff members are off on hols. We do this happily, without complaint because we know how screwed they'd be if we didn't.

Aaanyhoo, it became apparent last week that myself and other lady hadn't been invited to their Xmas do. No explanation, it wasn't even acknowledged at any point. All the FT employed staff went out to a party night at a hotel on an evening that myself and the other lady were in the office, so it's not like it happened on a day we weren't in. We all get on really well, there's no historical beef or anything, it's just totally unexplained and other than the fact we are PT and self employed I can't see any reason why we'd be excluded. AIBU to feel really miffed and to feel as though after the work we've put in this year it's a shitty way to treat people?
I made a jokey comment about us not being invited and everyone else in the office was really surprised that we weren't, so this is down to one of two managers or whoever organised it. I'm really pissed off about it and feel like I would rather work for someone who at least acknowledges our hard work and considers us part of the team. Am I overreacting?

OP posts:
misspiggy19 · 10/12/2019 12:42

I've worked for several companies that have a large bank of self employed contracters and they're never invited to any paid for staff entertainment.

^This

Newbie1981 · 10/12/2019 12:53

You're over reacting. I work freelance which is what you do, we don't get invited to the parties as we are not staff, end of

RomaineCalm · 10/12/2019 12:54

@Dacquoise I completely agree and I said in my previous post that the communication was poor.

However, from the other side, if you are working as self-employed you should know the rules that apply rather than expect your client to explain them to you. Equally, you shouldn't be surprised that you're not invited to meals/events/training that could compromise your self-employed status.

BlaueLagune · 10/12/2019 13:00

In a previous job a colleague and I complained in a team meeting that agency secretaries weren't invited to the office Christmas party.

Not sure why, but the HR manager was furious with us for daring to raise it. However, she did say it was to do with employee status and not wanting to blur boundaries.

I'm freelance and have been invited to one client's summer "do", and attend monthly training sessions at another client, where I get given lunch.

If, from April, they start saying I have to use an umbrella company I'll have to give it all up and get a proper job as I can't afford the outlay and overheads on the amount I earn.

AgentProvocateur · 10/12/2019 13:02

I think you should take a look at the HMRC regs to check whether you are legitimately self employed. You (and your employer) might be in for a nasty shock.

lovemenorca · 10/12/2019 13:06

* In a previous job a colleague and I complained in a team meeting that agency secretaries weren't invited to the office Christmas party.*

Not sure why, but the HR manager was furious with us for daring to raise it. However, she did say it was to do with employee status and not wanting to blur boundaries.

Because a team meeting is not an appropriate forum for this. You had a valid and reasonable query. It should have been raised with HR in the first instance rather than a team meeting.

Jaxhog · 10/12/2019 13:36

That is shit. Speaking as a former manager who had a varied team including self-employed contractors, I would NEVER have excluded them from a company party like this. This is a very fast way of causing disunity in a team.

I can't imagine any decent company excluding you like this.

Hoppinggreen · 10/12/2019 14:02

jaxhog while I agree with you in principle the new IR35 guidelines are causing a lot of companies to look at their relationships with their Contractors. It may be more from a fear of HMRC sanctions than rudeness/ insensitivity etc

myself2020 · 10/12/2019 14:32

Contractors are usually excluded from all of these staff benefits - subsidised meals, staff awards, parties. its because you are a contractor, with all the benefits and disadvantages of that!

Jaxhog · 10/12/2019 14:56

@hoppinggreen if this is the case, then I think their Manager should have made this clear as a matter of courtesy. Not to just keep quiet about it! But I suspect it isn't the real reason.

@myself2020 I get that they don't get the staff benefits, but excluding them from a once-a-year Christmas party is just mean.

DelphiniumBlue · 10/12/2019 16:02

The party is tax deductible for the company calculated per head to a limit, used to be around £35, not sure what it is now. They could still invite you, it's just that the cost would not be tax deductible if you are not an employee. So they are just trying to save themselves a tenner or so per head.
It's not very Christmassy in spirit and I'd be pissed off about it. It says how much they value you, doesn't it? I'd let the managers know it hasn't passed unnoticed that you are not being treated like part of the team. But if that's how they want to play things you'll follow their lead .

Butterflyflower1234 · 10/12/2019 16:17

I know it's not a nice feeling but it is a common occurrence. I work for a huge financial services company and they threw a firm wide Christmas party for around 3,000 people. They had to restrict this (initially) to permanent staff only. We probably have another 2,000 staff who are on temporary contracts or a contractors so they didn't get invited.

I know it doesn't feel nice but sadly it always comes down to cost.

PhilomenaChristmasPie · 10/12/2019 16:18

Get over yourselves.

BeatriceTheBeast · 10/12/2019 16:21

Self employed contractors don't get invited to Christmas parties ime. Mind you,in my former line of work, contractors were compensated with huge day rates, in exchange for not getting staff perks!

MinervaSaidThat · 10/12/2019 16:21

@PhilomenaChristmasPie

You’re bringing with Christmas cheer. Not.

MinervaSaidThat · 10/12/2019 16:22

*brimming

PuppyMonkey · 10/12/2019 16:40

As others have pointed out OP, your whole set up sounds a bit Hmm - going in on a Sunday and not being paid for it? WTF.

How do you receive payment, do you send invoices?

I’ve worked freelance for some time now, I never get invited to the Christmas do of my main client (thank GodXmas Grin) but a previous client I worked for always paid for me to go along and treated me to other stuff she was doing for her main staff - including a spa day.

myself2020 · 10/12/2019 16:48

@Jaxhog not mean - just not being an employee. usually they get far higher pay and can leave with minimal notice. they don’t have staff obligations, so also not staff benefits (and employers don’t get tax breaks for benefits for contractors). the op’s contractor position does sound really shifty though!

roses2 · 10/12/2019 16:58

At my work self employed colleagues were not invited although to be fair the boss apologised and told them why.

YANBU to be upset but YABU to expect an invite

burnoutbabe · 10/12/2019 18:17

you can generally invite spouses/partners etc along to xmas parties (the allowance being £150 per employee) so not sure why you can't invite contractors on same basis (and ex staff are often invited along who have just left)

I think they just got a staff list and forgot non payroll staff in the invite.

I always invited our contractors (but made it clear i'd not expect to be charged for the half day if they attended - was during work hours!)

BeatriceTheBeast · 10/12/2019 18:22

My DH's work did that one year. Instead of spouses, people brought the contractors in their team as their dates! It actually didn't go down all that well for some reason.

peachgreen · 10/12/2019 18:23

So much misinformation on here. The contractor is the one whose IR35 status is risk when they avail of (paid for) staff entertainment. OP's situation is a bit different as it doesn't sound like she's benefitting much from being self-employed but regardless, that's why contractors shouldn't accept invites even if they are invited erroneously.

Autumnfresh · 10/12/2019 18:28

If you're self employed, you are not legally allowed to attend Christmas parties and events where employees are given bonuses of sorts. I think it's tax thing. Its something that was brought about around 10 years ago I think. I remember all our consultants no longer being invited to parties or Christmas drinks.

As self employed I don't believe you are legally allowed to attend staff meetings either.

Hoppinggreen · 10/12/2019 18:31

My understanding peach that the changes due in April for private sector that are already (supposedly) in place in the Public sector mean that the IR35 responsibility now shifts to the end client rather than the contractor. This has led to many clients being a lot more aware or at least finding new ways around it .

Hingeandbracket · 10/12/2019 19:37

As self employed I don't believe you are legally allowed to attend staff meetings either.
Is your “legal adviser” propping up the bar in your local pub by any chance? This is utter bobbins.