Absent father playing santa

[Louise91417]

I will try to keep this short. I have ds 2.5 whose father has been absent for over a year. (15 months to be exact). Last year, he sent a christmas present for ds via a family member. As xmas is fast approaching im finding myself getting seriously wound up at the thought of a rap at the door and the same thing again this year, someone sent with present for ds. Would i be unreasonable to tell them to shove the present up their ass?

I wouldn't even stir myself to answer the door, tbh.

Go on holiday

Nope not unreasonable at all. Just roll your eyes and close the door. Alternatively take the gift and donate it to charity but you would still have to have it in your house then.

I think im more concerned im gona make a complete ass out of myself and tell them what i think of them in front of neighbours. Im not really one for dramas but really d9nt think i will be able told hold back. Im very much a believer of a childs for life not for xmas

My sister calls my ex “santa” because he shows up once a year. Then disappears again. So I laughed when I read the title, though it’s obviously not funny just pathetic really but I can relate to it.

Can you accept it and then donate to a charity? And when you next see the relative courier, let them know that 'The NSPCC were very grateful for the donation.'

"A child is for life, not for Christmas."

Perfect, OP! Say that as you close the door. It's all you need to say.

I should mention ex partner was very controlling and abusive. I feel like him giving a xmas present when he doesnt support throughout the year is just a last ditch attempt to control.

Can't he just send money and you buy things your dc needs? I've just taken £300 off mine (to his credit he's trying to have a relationship with his dc but they are young adults and not keen on seeing him!)

Ideally id prefer he set up a bank accout for ds and when time comes (ds old enough) he can decide if he wants to accept it.