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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Advent calendars aren’t gifts?

92 replies

pingoose · 08/12/2019 17:31

MIL has just dropped off an advent calendar for DD (halfway through advent but never mind). I’d already bought her one weeks ago, so now she has two which seems unnecessary.

AIBU to think you don’t usually give them to other people as gifts? They’re the kind of thing I enjoy buying and was looking forward to doing once I had kids!

OP posts:
TidyDancer · 08/12/2019 17:32

YABU imo, it's just weird that it's part way through the month. Nothing wrong with a grandparent buying one though.

FuzzyPuffling · 08/12/2019 17:34

Our friends have given us a Cheese Advent Calendar. It is an awesome gift.

TinklyLittleLaugh · 08/12/2019 17:35

No you are right OP, how dare she bring your DD something nice. What an absolute old bitch. When will these controlling old hags realise that only the mother is allowed to do something nice for their own child? She’s had her chance to love a small child. You put her in her place if she dares to love yours. I’d be going no contact if I were you.

MordredsOrrery · 08/12/2019 17:36

Even the voting buttons think you're being unreasonable Xmas Grin

Advent calendars aren’t gifts?
ChessieFL · 08/12/2019 17:38

I buy my DD one but so does my mum. What’s the problem with them having two? The chocolate pieces are so small they’re hardly going to overdose on sugar.

Knicknamehistory · 08/12/2019 17:38

I think there is more to this than just you wanting to buy the advent calendars. They are selling them all off now and I was tempted today to buy my kids a second one for 49p! You obviously just hate the woman and she cant do anything right. I do understand that though as I feel that way about my MIL. However she wouldnt be thoughtful enough to buy my kids advent calendars...

CrowBones · 08/12/2019 17:38

It's only a third of the way through Advent

I8toys · 08/12/2019 17:39

I love advent calendars personally and always buy them for my mum, husband, kids and cats.

itsmecathycomehome · 08/12/2019 17:39

I buy one for dp, all four dc, both nieces and the dog.

If anyone already has one then they now have two!

You really are sulking about nothing.

SnorkMaiden81 · 08/12/2019 17:40

It was a thoughtful, kind thing to do!

Your resentment of her runs deeper, I feel.

Lunde · 08/12/2019 17:41

I have always bought advent calendars as gifts for the whole family - even though the "kids" and working/at Uni.

The "kids" got Lindt ones this year - but DH was more difficult as he is diabetic so I got him a pork scratchings one!

Original poster
pingoose · 08/12/2019 17:41

Wow TinklyLittleLaugh, is it because I said it was my MIL? I actually love her, and DD was obviously very appreciative. I just realised I’d never been given one as a gift before, and wondered if it was more common than I thought.

OP posts:
charm8ed · 08/12/2019 17:42

I’d happily accept one as a gift and would be happy to scoff the first 8 chocolates today.

Aragog · 08/12/2019 17:42

Totally normal here for grandparents to buy their grandchild an advent calendar sometimes. My parents have always gotten dd a chocolate calendar - she's 17y now and still loves the extra one! Though we had to postpone our visit to see them on the 1st due to a medical issue, so she gets hers next weekend - and will no doubt eat all the 'gone days' in one go!

EskewedBeef · 08/12/2019 17:42

I think they were sent as little presents, (possibly in Victorian times) like a special greetings cards. I vaguely remember listening to that TV historian Ruth something talking about it.

Notsurehowtofixit · 08/12/2019 17:42

I think you didn't use to, but now they come full of toys and stuff, and we've been getting them as presents. Just the last few years.

AHippoNamedBooBooButt · 08/12/2019 17:43

My dh does home help for an elderly lady (he started off doing weeding and odd jobs then started taking her shopping and cooking once a week...) and as a thank you she bought each of our dc an advent calendar which I thought was a lovely gift. So yes they now have 2 each as well but that's ok, just double the chocolate.
So yabu, it was a lovely gift give your mil a break

EskewedBeef · 08/12/2019 17:43

Anyway, yes it's still normal to give them to other people Smile

MrsAJ27 · 08/12/2019 17:43

I always buy one for my niece and nephew, so do their parents and sometimes grandparents

BanginChoons · 08/12/2019 17:45

My elderly next door neighbours buy my kids advent calendars every year. I think it is very kind of them.

DecemberSnow · 08/12/2019 17:46

I know people who give these all the time.

My uncle bought them for the kids next door , white chocolate ones, and he was told by the mother 'Oh they prefer milk chocolate to white chocolate" cheeky fucker!!!

abouttime2 · 08/12/2019 17:47

My friend bought my children a Lego advent calendar instead of a Christmas present to open on Christmas Day this year. I though it was a great idea. Didn't find it strange atall, I actually think it was really thoughtful.

abouttime2 · 08/12/2019 17:48

Although I agree it should have been given before December 1st

Tonii1985 · 08/12/2019 17:48

It seems to be a thing among the 20 somethings I work with for their boyfriends to spend £100-200 on an advent calender as a gift for them. Expensive department store or make up brand ones.

My DH last bought be a £1.50 Cadbury one maybe 5 years ago. I'm very jealous.

If I were you I would eat the one from your MIL all to yourself 😂

Minky35 · 08/12/2019 17:49

I don’t get this attitude on MN. Only the mother can buy certain items as it’s her right. it’s not exactly crime of the century is it?
Both my mum & MIL buy my kids their calendars, and yes the kids eat 2 chocolates quite happily, strangely enough.