Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Not wanting to face Christmas effecting everything

37 replies

Patchworkquilt24 · 07/12/2019 12:31

I just don't want to do Christmas this year. I'm really struggling with my mental health, every day is relative torture anyway. My family are all arguing, there's conflict everywhere I turn.
But not wanting to do it is effecting everything. People everywhere are celebrating and preparing and excited and I couldn't care less about it. I really try and pretend to work colleagues etc that I'm excited and try and make up things about buying presents/food/decorations when in reality I've not got a single decoration up. Massive argument with DH this morning because I've said I don't really want anything to do with Christmas and I don't want to have to tell him what I want because it doesn't make me feel special. I feel so sad now.

OP posts:

PippiDeLena · 07/12/2019 17:59

Patchworkquilt if you don't have children then you don't need to fake it and celebrate. You don't need to tolerate your arguing family, or buy into any of the other crap. Can you go off somewhere, with or without your DH? You could go on a retreat, a European city break, a beach holiday, anything. It'll give you something to look forward to away from the pressure of your life.

JaceLancs · 07/12/2019 18:11

My Dad died a few weeks ago and I’m not feeling very festive
I have bought some presents - will trim up and we are going out for Xmas lunch
But I just want it to be over with and get into January when I’m going on holiday (booked to cheer myself up)

PinkiOcelot · 07/12/2019 18:16

You’re not alone. I was driving home earlier thinking I hate Christmas. I’m not looking forward to it all.
This is the second Christmas since I lost my brother and I’ve just got no interest at all.
Last year I was really dreading it. It was going to be just the 4 of us. Arguing in the family just like you. Anyway on Christmas morning we just got up, not too early (my dds are trans now) we then decided to go walk along the beach. We drove, had a walk along the beach then stopped for a drink in the pub. It was quite a nice day really.
I still can’t be bothered with it though and reading this thread, it’s sad that so many people feel the same.
Hope things pick up for you OP x

PinkiOcelot · 07/12/2019 18:16

My dds are teens now!!

Eggies · 07/12/2019 18:21

It's not just you I feel the same about Christmas. I've got everything I ever wanted this year a DH a baby and another on the way but I've been struggling (to say the least) with my MH since DS was born and now we also have financial problems coming out of our ears too and it's getting more difficult to pretend I'm happy. I feel awful just writing that I love my babies and wish I knew what's wrong with me

Outsomnia · 07/12/2019 18:43

I am looking forward to 21st December, the Solstice, the days brighten up every day by the minute after that. We will have turned the Winter corner at last... Lovely.

Christmas is a construct to get us through the dog days of the Winter, but I'm not buying into the commercialism of it all. That just depresses me.

However, each to their own. And enjoy whatever way you want to, but don't be pressurised into something you do NOT enjoy.

Mydogmylife · 07/12/2019 19:01

@outsomnia

Thanks - and to you to for this day- anniversaries are a struggle

And sympathy to all other posters struggling with the loss of a loved one over Christmas - it's a tricky time to navigate through

dontalltalkatonce · 07/12/2019 19:04

I really hate it. So much ado about one sodding day and a roast. We don't put up any deccies, go out for curry and exchange gifts. That's it.

madcatladyforever · 07/12/2019 19:08

I haven't done it for years, I don't give a shit about xmas. I have a nice day off work and that's it. My family are used to it now. I'm not a christian so why should I go crazy over a festival I care nothing about.

Outsomnia · 07/12/2019 19:29

I am suppressing the loss of my mother for the sake of the season.

But the fact that few acknowledge my loss in the frenzy of shopping and the best tree and all the rest of it makes me realise that I am right to just fk it and do my own thing!

OldGrinch · 07/12/2019 19:32

I absolutely hate this time of year. I've really struggled with my mental health for the past two years (thanks Menopause) I have teenage DC who love it all and I have to put on a brave face for them. We are supposed to be putting up tree and decs tomorrow and an absolutely dreading it. We don't have any extended family except my parents who declared a few years ago that they were no longer "doing Christmas" as it was too much for my Mum. They didn't want visitors and they didn't want to travel anywhere. Fair enough I thought, however they have continued to invite my brother and his family every year! Very sad and hurtful but that's another thread. Hugs to everyone who feels crap at this time of year x

Oliversmumsarmy · 08/12/2019 15:22

I sometimes think I am on a different planet to some people.

I was in a shop in November and every set of people around me were discussing what they were getting everyone and ticking things off lists

It just leaves me cold.

If Christmas was just a couple of days prep and the day itself I might feel differently about it but I read on here people who have had their decorations up since early November.

Aren’t people bored by it all.

Flip

1 2