I need some advice about how to handle my toxic ex MIL. My ex and I split 1.5 years ago. Very messy and brutal. He is an alcoholic, couldn't hold down a job, drained me of every ounce of self worth and lived off me for 15 years. Boom. He inherits some money and then straight out of the door. On the night my dad was in hospital and we were all told to visit to say our last goodbyes. We have 2 DDs. And at first, he was crap and couldnt be arsed with them. To add insult to injury, at my lowest ebb he was laughing and taking piss out of me being a mess. Total narc. But now, is seeing them regularly and by all accounts being a decent dad. Felt bitter and angry for a year. And decided best approach was to totally blowtorch him, his family and mutual friends. It worked. Finally rebuilding myself. The problem is, my cunt of a MIL (who is v manipulative and toxic) continues to shit stir. To give an example, when my ex and I split, i wanted to delay telling my mum cos my dad was dying in hospital. Told this to my ex. Who told his mum and. You guessed it. She called my mum behind my back. Claiming it was in all our interests and for my own good. She also constantly encouraged my ex to drink even though he went to rehab not once. But twice. She denied he had a drink problem. ......@#$$???? My ex sees kids almost every day for school drop off (When not hungover and oversleeps). He doesn't do weekends cos we tried and he kept cancelling cos better offers kept coming his way. The girls sleepover mid week too. He stays in control of his drinking on those nights. I have said no to holidays though. Bitter experience. And even though he kicked off at first, he accepts it. The girls can see we dont talk and dislike each other. But I don't bad mouth him. And am positive about fun they have at his, presents he might get them etc. Confess I did bad mouth the first few months after split. But not now. The MIL is something else. She can't stop shit stirring. She knows the no holiday decision, but directly asks my DDs if they want to go on family holiday with her and the rest if family this summer. Now, i do bad mouth the MIL to girls. Tell them that granny is trying to cause arguments and to be careful not to listen to her. They know I don't trust her and can't stand her. I obv can't stop her seeing them. And tell them that their relationship is separate to mine with her. But i am definately painting a non neutral picture of her. Is that wrong? Not sure i am capable of anything else. I really loathe her. Have described tip of iceberg her. And I wish she'd hurry up and have a stroke.