Thought on this Please

[User57327259]

I have been on MN for quite a while but name changed for this. I really need to combined wisdon of MN to decide what to do about all of this. I am doubting my own thoughts. I have been reading things on MN and in other places and I am only succeeding in worrying more.

A couple split up because the husband was a useless "cocklodger". Full of promises that were never fulfilled. Always acting big and making huge promises like a very long haul trip for the family to lesser things like trips to the cinema and everything inbetween.

There was a strange time when the man was taking a lot of interest in the step daughter and not his own daughter. It was at this time that the girl stopped personal grooming. She did say one time that she was being abused but an offer to take her to police, rape intervention or police was refused.

Time went by and she got herself into a series of disastrous relationships, got into a lot of trouble and had a whole bunch of kids. For some reason she kept close to the ex step father.

Another child that this ex step father has access to seems to have some inappropriate sexual knowledge. This was reported to the mother who talked of going to the school, doctor or police about this but was talked out of this by the ex step father.

This ex step father seems to be able to convince people that his lies are facts and has caused a lot of trouble. Despite the truths eventually coming out no-one has ever taken him to task on the things he has done. He seems to get away with everything.

While it is not acceptable at all that there may be questions about abuse of children and children with sexual knowledge beyond their years the question is whether there is any point in reporting these situations as it will likely be disbelieved.

It should be reported particularly for the sake of the child now possibly being abused. Hopefully one day their mother (stepdaughter) will also be able to break away from the hold the ex stepfather has over her and get the help she needs. The wake up call may very well be her child getting help and the ex stepfather being caught or at least suspicions made known

The child is not the child of the step daughter.

The mother of the child has little contact with others now which is suspiciously viewed by some

Bump

Yes absolutely report. It will be taken seriously and may prevent another child suffering

How would I report it and to who? I have heard of NSPCC and SS but don't really know what they would do, or how they would go about things and also if they each can be careful not to disclose who said what.
Thanks for comments and views

Please do report it but please be aware that there may be no action.

I know someone in a similar position. One child came forward, reported it to police, they asked him if it was true and he said no.
There were other victims but too scared to come forward so that was that.

He's now married to a woman with young teenage girls but because there was no criminal charge there's nothing anyone can do.

It sounds like it is not just a matter of telling someone. The problem could be that the person is forewarned if there is a report and nothing much done.

How could anyone justify accepting the word of the accused without making a full investigation? That sounds so much like the well known mistakes where children have suffered horribly and then SS say lessons have been learned. It does not look like they learn much if they accept the word of the accused.
I know of an adult woman who experienced unwanted sexual advances. She reported it to the Police and nothing was done. This is not a lot of use.
It looks like there is nothing to be achieved and possibly a fair bit of danger in making a report. If it is not guaranteed to help the child it is not worth doing

Even if nothing is done it is better to report. Often multiple reports will trigger an investigation more than the odd one or two. Gradually evidence accumulates, sometimes it takes a lot of time and people get discouraged. Put your report into Socail services and inclide all the historical stuff, but be prepared for them to consider it hearsay. It will still need to be documented and will have to come out if a subsequent report goes to court

@User57327259 it is disgusting.

The positive side is:

1. if there are any further reports the police will use other historic reports as evidence because it'll no longer just be his word against hers
2. if he knows people aren't scared to come forward he might realise that his actions are inappropriate (if they are just inappropriate and not assault/abuse as such) and change his ways I guess

He is an accomplished liar and quite the con man. He is not that brave but he is confident in his lies and puts that across. He has conned banks into loans he should never have had, and things like that. He is a control freak as well and has managed a lot of control over people in a surprising way.

Hmm if I was suspicious of a child being abused, I'd phone social services up to go get him checked out. It must be a very scary world for abused children. I have a friend who was abused by her mum's friend when she was 8. She did not speak up for a few years until she found out he was hurting her sister who was 5 too. He did a small amount of prison and now lives back in our home town. I don't know the ins and outs but it was 20 years ago. They often need other adults too get involved as they are incapable of speaking up if they have been threatened etc

I have been worried by the experiences of PP. It is scary to think that people are getting away with this and the authorities are not taking things seriously.
With little hope I emailed an organisation with almost the same words as my OP. I got a message back that this was concerning and could I give names and further details. I thought they were taking this seriously and replied with information,
A few hours later I got another email stating that the information had gone to a manager and that they were not going ahead. The fact that there is historic information in there is the reason for this change of decision. Yet they still say it is concerning!
I thought historic stuff was all the things coming out now about football coaches, at least one politician and a member of the Royal Family.

I don't know what to do next. I am put off doing anything more. A child is very likely in a lot of trouble and the authorities are not going to do anything about it.

Even if nothing comes of it, I would report every single time.

I have sent another email saying that I will be keeping a record of the contact.
It took a lot of emotional stress to make that contact and for the information to be disregarded worries me that a child is in a bad situation and a person trying to help are both ignored. I don't care for myself so much. I know a child cant get help for themselves

Yesterday there was some further information about the rape and murder of a young girl. This took place on a Scottish Island. It turns out that Social Services were twice alerted to the 16 year old boy who did this but it looks like it was not properly dealt with or this 6 year old would be alive today

.www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/alesha-macphail-latest-trial-murder-suspect-bute-glasgow-high-court-case-a8779581.html

I hope that link works.

What chance do any of us have if no-one acts to ensure the safety of children?