Having a horrible day. Don't know what to do.

[bakabakabeyond]

I'm being dragged through court by my abusive ex. Trying to protect my son. Had a horrible comment about the fact I am 'still breatfeeding when he's old enough to use a bottle' (he's only just turned one). I am tearful, life feels too much, waiting to get my son from nursery and just want to hold him. I feel utterly hopeless and unlovable. What do you do when you feel like this? I just feel hopeless.

I have a large gin.

Sorry to hear you are having a bad time. Breast feeding at one is fine, You should be praised for it not critisised. he should never need a bottle so whoever made that comment is just ignorant. Keep strong. Do you have a friend who could give you a bit of company?

Aah that's awful there's nothing wrong with extended breastfeeding, I bf my dd until she was two. Who made the comment, if it was your ex he just sounds horrible and no judge would think badly of someone breastfeeding a baby until that age, it's perfectly normal.

I'm sorry you are going through this, don't have much advice other than what @brimful has suggested!

I say to myself, one thing at a time. What do you need to think about to get through the day, and worry about the rest never later. I think you're awesome breastfeeding at 1. I had twins and I never managed to breastfeed after about the first 10 days. Imagine how much that is doing for your DS, both his health and also the comfort of it for him. People can be right dicks. Don't worry it's them not you.

Unmumsnetty hugs may help? And some of this:

I feel like I am falling apart.

Take a deep breath.

My way is to think through the choices I’ve made a try and look at them objectively. Am I still confident in my own decision.

Think about your choice to breastfeed and why you came to that decision. Does it change when you consider other people’s opinions? Do you respect the people making these comments?

For example, my father is a poor excuse as a father so I don’t respect his opinions on my parenting. He can comment but I take no notice because I’m parenting differently as a direct result of things he did that I disagree with. However, I would ask for advice on money matters because I do respect his opinion there.

Sorry to hear you are having a turbulent time. Bravo for still breastfeeding! Pop on a good film, or have a read of some of the hilarious threads that people have written on here in the classics! I'm yet to read the thread about accidentally painting a pigeon....

Gatehouse77, that's sound advice

I am so sorry
Going through a very tough time also with an abusive ex
It is hell ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Hugs, I know how you feel I had this at 9 months and then got accused about lying I was feeding still.

Unfortunately my friend went through this and the court sided with the ex 😡 I really hope the courts are better with you

I remember your bravery on your last thread, Baka.
A baby is 'old enough to take a bottle' from birth, but that is not what you, his DMum, has chosen to do and there is nothing wrong with that at all.
His DF is an abusive git and his opinion does not count. Was he even allowed access? I thought he hadn't been??
You are stronger than you think - you have shown us the evidence of that. Have your wobble, then give your boy a great big snuggle. Eat chocolate. And cake. Hugs, Baka.

All I can say is this: let it wash over you like it’s water off a ducks back. It’s designed to make you feel shit. I had the same and worse from abusive ex. I understand it’s relentless. It affected my MH so badly in the end that SS gave my children to my abusers. Don’t let that happen to you.

Can you distance yourself from it? I put some people into the category of being so hateful and destructive that nothing they say is in anyway relevant. So when they express opinions, make claims, issue instructions, I ignore without giving it any thought at all. They have disqualified themselves from getting any of my attention at all.