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AIBU?

To want to find my (gay) friend a girlfriend.

23 replies

TheoriginalLEM · 02/12/2019 21:11

I have a friend, she is 60, gay and lonely. She is a professional woman and the most socially awkward person I've ever met.

She is lovely but very single minded. I would say she has aspergers. So those things make it difficult for her to meet people and I guess being gay does??

Is there a website/dating agency for lesbians that i could recommend that isn't the gay equivalent of tinder?

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FineWordsForAPorcupine · 02/12/2019 21:13

Does she want to meet someone?

TheoriginalLEM · 02/12/2019 21:27

Lol yes we were discussing it today and the other week. She is actually desperate for a gf/ company

OP posts:

Iggleonkupsy · 02/12/2019 21:31

Why does her being gay make it difficult to meet people?
I'm pretty sure all of the dating websites are for straight or gay people too.

Aquamarine1029 · 02/12/2019 21:32

Personally, I would stay out of her personal/intimate life. That is something only she can manage.

Ghia135 · 02/12/2019 21:35

I don't think being gay makes it difficult to meet people, it doesnt for my friends and family member anyway. Being socially awkward will though as even if you meet someone on a dating app you eventually have to meet them in person.

I would maybe work on building their social confidence first.

apacketofcrisps · 02/12/2019 21:36

If she wants to find someone she needs to make an effort 🤷🏼‍♀️

HakunaRattatas · 02/12/2019 21:36

Do you people understand numbers? Of course it's harder

joystir59 · 02/12/2019 21:39

I don't think being gay makes it difficult to meet people, it doesnt for my friends and family member anyway. Being socially awkward will though as even if you meet someone on a dating app you eventually have to meet them in person. I would maybe work on building their social confidence first
This is a homophobic statement.

TheoriginalLEM · 02/12/2019 21:43

I should have made it clear, the social awkwardness and generally being quite hard work are her issues.

I was hoping to be signposted towards gay dating sites.

She was asking my advice

OP posts:

thentheycameforme · 02/12/2019 21:46

Some posters are being deliberately obtuse, of course being gay makes it harder to find a partner statistically (and that's before taking into account age, geographical location etc)

OP just wanted suggestions not judgement and scathing, unhelpful comments

TheoriginalLEM · 02/12/2019 21:47

'm pretty sure all of the dating websites are for straight or gay people too. I said this very thing to her today.

Re the social awkwardness - surely there must be someone else equally awkward out tgere for her

OP posts:

Pebble21uk · 02/12/2019 21:51

Try Pink Sofa. Don't know what it's like now, but it's where I met my wife 12 years ago!!
Just had a look and now it's for over 30s only, so may be a good one for her!

OrlandoInTheWilderness · 02/12/2019 21:51

My gay friend found her fiancé on a site called Pink Cupid. She also made me sign up so I could stalk profiles without it showing she had been on them!!!! Lucky I was single at the time!

JKScot4 · 02/12/2019 21:52

@joystir59
That is not homophobic at all, quite the opposite!
@Ghia135 is saying being gay isn’t stopping her meeting ppl it’s her social awkwardness.

TheoriginalLEM · 02/12/2019 21:54

Thanks - I'll tell her to think pink!!!

OP posts:

Ohdearohdearyme · 02/12/2019 21:57

@joystir59 How was that homophobic? Genuine question.

fartingrainbows · 02/12/2019 22:02

Her, pink Cupid, pink sofa.

Also there are several lesbian Facebook groups. Some social meet up groups and some dating groups. They might be a good way to start as she can join in with general chat and see who makes her smile.

joystir59 · 03/12/2019 10:03

Homophobic because it assumes a non-gay person knows as much about gay dating as a gay person would. Also, the word for a female homosexual is lesbian

easyandy101 · 03/12/2019 11:05

Fuckin hell

RockinHippy · 03/12/2019 11:14

I'm gobsmacked that some think finding a gay or lesbian partner is as easy as

To quote my once longtime single lesbian friend living in rural up north. "I'm literally the only gay in the village, or town, or miles around" she's married now though & met her wife through Pink Cupid

fartingrainbows · 03/12/2019 18:00

Homophobic because it assumes a non-gay person knows as much about gay dating as a gay person would. Also, the word for a female homosexual is lesbian

@joystir59
Some women prefer the word gay to lesbian and I don't think that really matters at all.

Also, I don't find anything homophobic about the original post and whilst some posts on here might be a bit naive, that's not the same as being homophobic.
I'm a gay woman (lesbian if you like ) and haven't read anything homophobic here.

LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 03/12/2019 18:04

Does she enjoy going to pubs and clubs? Maybe trot along to something like a film or music festival or something like that? She might meet some new friends as well as potential partners.

Ohdearohdearyme · 03/12/2019 19:28

My sister is gay (and prefers gay to lesbian) and she regularly dates through guardian dating I believe.

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