To take ds out of nursery??

[99GreenBalloons]

He's 2, and constantly picking up bugs from that place. I know it's to be expected but he's been there for 12 months and he seems to have lots of time off due to illness. Six months ago we almost lost him due to sepsis from strep he caught from there. In the past 6 weeks he's had hand foot mouth disease, chest infection now an awful cold he's like a little zombie 😔 I know it's good to build immunity but it is beginning to impact his life.

AIBU to remove him and have a more healthy boy?

I’m so sorry you’ve had such a rough ride. Unfortunately it’s t**ser parents sending their kids when they’re ill and the nursery not being strict enough. We’ve all got to work that’s why are kids are there but if they’re ill they need to be at home.

We’re not fairing great at the C minders, only 2 other babies and wrap around for a 7 and 8 yo. My DC has had a cold since sept (obvs different ones and nowhere near as serious as your wee one) and Noro (which he gave to us) its one of the babies who incidentally goes Nursery on a Friday. Brings everything in and gives it to the the other two always starts with that baby as the mother refuses to admit her child’s ill and will not follow the 48hr rule. Had D&V again last week and was in 24 hrs later. Told me ‘yeah she’s been sick a few times but only one bad nappy and temp only raised a little so don’t think it’s a bug’ I took my DC out and will be taking him back this week but lo and behold the other little baby is off with D&V!!!

takeit the HPA advice is based on a child who is well enough to go in. Obviously they’re not suggesting you take a child out of their sick bed with glandular fever. But if they’re well enough then schools/nurseries should not be excluding them, is what it means.

Previously we were in the ridiculous situation where as GPs we were seeing well children with e.g. conjunctivitis and parents requesting antibiotics for it (which it usually doesn’t need) just so the child could go back to nursery.

OP it does sound like you’ve had a bad run, but as pp said you don’t catch sepsis, it’s an immune response to another infection. As your son hasn’t had d+v I’d be inclined to think it’s not a hygiene issue at the nursery. Kids get bugs - that’s what they do - and they’re pretty good at spreading them around too! It’s a miserable business though when they’re ill all the time. He may fare better at a childminder with fewer other children around.

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland HF&M can be serious. My DS was hospitalized with it once. He has had it three times now and it has been awful every time.

Haven't read through the thread but ex nursery manager here.

Your poor child. That really is a lot of illness and sounds awful.

I would be concerned about infection control, cleaning and implementation of Health and Safety Policies.

Yes, children get unwell when they start Nursery as they build up their immunity, but that sounds extreme. Also the time of year means bugs are rife.

All the more reason for Nurseries to be strict.

I would be questioning things like hand washing procedures for the children, as well as appropriate ventilation. As well as cleaning and frequency of toys/ bathrooms etc

I would be concerned about the Managements role in ensuring unwell children stay off. For example, a child who is sick, should always stay off for 48 hours. Regardless.

As a Manager I used to hear it all. Something they ate etc etc
As nurseries are predominately used by working parents , many don't even tell you that their child is unwell in the first place.
You discover it a few hours down the line, when the Calpol wears off or they are sick.

It's absolutely poor parenting but I'm not on here to criticise that.

Definitely speak to the Manager and go with your gut.

There are poor Nurseries and there are good Nurseries and it doesn't sound as though the one your child attends is particularly good.

Your poor DS, I had the exact same thoughts when my DS1 started nursery as he was ill with colds/conjunctivitis/hand foot and mouth for nearly 6 months. But now at nearly 4 his immune system is great (although this year starting nursery school has been exposure again!).

Is it worth having your DS checked out for anything that might affect his immune system, as 12 months is a long time to get so poorly? Poor thing having sepsis, that must have been terrifying for you.

Also FYI not all nurseries exclude for hand foot and mouth, DS' didn't. Nor conjunctivitis.

I think some of it depends on the nursery. My daughter was ill almost every Friday in her first year. She caught chicken pox, HF&M and anything else going. I was despairing. However in the last year and a bit she's been fine. She's at a university nursery mixing with children from all over the world, so there have been a lot of things that she had no immunity from. Also, we only did one mother and baby class before she went, so she hadn't spent much time mixing with other children.

Chestnut it can be. It can also be very mild. My son barely noticed he had it, i would have been fuming if the CM had said he couldn't go for a week as some nurseries do.
As said above, the chart is about infection control. Of course if a child is poorly in themselves, they should be at home.

Exclusion with HFM is pointless as it is spread before symptoms show, a child excluded has already passed to everyone anyway.

What is the nursery's sickness policy? Mine is very strict and my 2 were ill a lot to start with but after their first winter they rarely get more than a cold.

NHS advises that you don't need to stay off school for HF&M so I don't think that necessarily indicates a lack of infection control or hygiene issues.
That said, it does seem a lot of illness. Mine are hardly ever ill and at nursery almost full time

I've heard people say that going to nursery and catching all the bugs as a baby gives children a better immune system but that hasn't been my experience. Neither of mine went to nursery (preschool, mornings only from about 2 years old) and one has had nearly 100% attendance at school, the other is usually high 90s.

That doesn’t sound totally abnormal to me. He was very unlucky to develop sepsis but there is a lot going around at the moment so if he was run down, he might have just got lots at once.

How many days does he go in? I always found that mine was wiped out after 3 days in a row and needed recovery time. She used to sleep for 3-4 hours on the Friday and just needed time to chill at home. I also found if she was going to get Ill, it tended to be at the end of the week. We’ve had worse than average luck with sickness and it is rubbish.

Honestly I think take him out.

I had a similar experience with a nursery that my eldest was in from Sept to Jan.

Then I removed her and put her in another nursery and she was much better - still caught colds but we had initially - a constant cold and 2 d&v bugs - 3-4 trips to hospital for breathing issues from the bad colds.

Ironically I got out at the best time - I gave notice to leave and voiced my concerns to the manager about the constant illness. They then asked me to leave by the end of the week because I didn't think they were good enough! Awful place has shut down now and thankfully the new nursery could take me sooner!

I didn't get my deposit back. They were crooks.

I’d take him out. If only for a rest and to recuperate.

Like others have said I’d expect a lot of snotty noses in the first few weeks but then for it to calm down.

Kids immune systems vary a lot. My kid is prone to chesty cough & bad ears but only pukes if we rear face him in the car. My sister's two pick up every vom bug going. You could keep him home & find he still catches everything any way.