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AIBU?

To suggest we just stop buying presents for each others' kids

7 replies

MangoChutney54 · 02/12/2019 16:58

My sister and I aren't close, very different people, but are on OK terms. Probably see each other every few months, mostly for the sake of our kids who are similarly aged (between 5 and 8 - she has two, I have one).

When the kids were young we would ask each other for suggestions for Christmas and birthdays and buy presents which we chose, usually checking to make sure we weren't duplicating something they already had. Sometimes we'd send links. All fine.

This year, my sister has gone one step further and asked me to just transfer money for presents she'd already bought her two. I did it, but am not sure they'll even be told or register that it's from me. In return, she's sent my daughter a gift she's already got, that I have just spent 20 mins on the phone to the company trying to swap.

Is there any point? Why don't we just save our money and buy our own children what they want? Plus even if I ask for the same in return, it works out to her advantage as I will always be spending double what she is - which I never minded when there was some element of personal input, but without that, it just seems a bit daft.

Is it really stingy to just say let's call it a day?

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dementedpixie · 02/12/2019 17:07

I dont exchange gifts with my sister's or brother's kids any more as we ended up giving cash to each other so it was bit pointless.

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MangoChutney54 · 02/12/2019 17:37

Thanks dementedpixie, I'm thinking along the same lines. Good to know others do it!

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boomboom1234 · 02/12/2019 18:36

Me and my sister just agreed a budget this xmas and each bought for our own kids and will Tell the kids it's from the aunt. To be fair she lives abroad now so it's just easier than trying to post etc plus it's so hard to know what they already have. It does feel very transactional though and a bit weird.

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LellyMcKelly · 02/12/2019 18:53

We stopped it - other than a selection box. That’s plenty.

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MangoChutney54 · 02/12/2019 19:05

Thanks both. boomboom I like that idea - do you think it would work as we have different numbers of kids?

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SilverySurfer · 02/12/2019 19:26

You've left it a bit late for this year. Could you suggest stopping after this Christmas?

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MangoChutney54 · 02/12/2019 20:22

Ah sorry yes we've already done presents for Christmas. This is just for the future.

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